Your mom is
- When she goes to the beach, the tide comes in
- She has her own area code
- When she fell off the Titanic, the whales came up and sang "we are family"
- You run around her twice and get lost
- When I tell her to haul ass, she gotta make two trips.
- She stepped on the scale and it said "to be continued".
...is so dumb...Edit
- She brings a spoon to the Super Bowl
- She was locked in a grocery store and died of starvation.
- She steals free bread
...is so old...Edit
- I thought she was your grandmammy
- She owes Moses a quarter!
- she was a waitress at the Last Supper!
- her social security number is 000-00-0001
- I told her to act her age and she nearly died.
...is so gay...Edit
- You have two moms!
- That she isn't
...is so white...Edit
- Stephen Colbert calls her "sir"
- She makes Barry Manilow and Jeff Dunham look like black guys.
...is so short...Edit
- You can see her legs in her ID photo