The Greatest President Ever Officially Endorses John McCainEdit


  • That thing I said in 2000 about you. I did not mean it.-- 00:43, 6 March 2008 (UTC)
  • "Come along John. I hear they're serving mashed banana and firing up an episode of Matlock in the Press Room. You like banana don't you. Yes you do!" --Careax 07:47, 6 March 2008 (UTC)

Water Released From Glen Canyon DamEdit


  • Stephen's manly potency reaches new levels. --Careax 07:41, 6 March 2008 (UTC)

Farmers Battle DroughtEdit


  • Surely economic disparity doesn't exist in a Communist Nation all of China must be suffering just like us. 04:04, 6 March 2008 (UTC)Grazon

China Opens World's Largest Airport TerminalEdit


  • Uh right. 04:04, 6 March 2008 (UTC)Grazon
  • "Hmmm... can I have a larger mop? Like one about 60 feet in width?!" --Careax 07:48, 6 March 2008 (UTC)

Twin Polar Bear Cubs Introduced In ViennaEdit

To suggest names for the bears, click here


Never Before Seen Image Of Helen Keller RevealedEdit


  • Hey Helen want to her a joke about seeing and hearing people? 20:07, 8 March 2008 (UTC)Grazon
  • "Stephen - his name is STEPHEN! STEPHEN!" - The Lake Effect 12:02, 8 March 2008 (UTC)

More Than 1 In 100 Americans Are Behind BarsEdit


  • you're all goin to hell. --GlennBecksATool 05:42, 6 March 2008 (UTC)
  • Working bar at the Little Person Pickpocket Inn was always a problem. Especially when it came to knee fondling and tips. --Careax 05:54, 7 March 2008 (UTC)
  • ...only 99 out of a 100 left to go... - The Lake Effect 12:03, 8 March 2008 (UTC)
  • We need to solve this problem by executing more murderers. 20:08, 8 March 2008 (UTC)Grazon

Explosion In New York's Times SquareEdit


  • "I want you ... to stop blowing me up, damn it!!" --Careax 05:53, 7 March 2008 (UTC)
  • Sign up to fight them over there so you don't have to fight them he... oh, right. -The Lake Effect 12:04, 8 March 2008 (UTC)
  • Throw a bomb at an empty bulding here and you're a terrorist. Send Americans over seas for profit knowing they'll have bombs thrown at them and you're a war President. Go figure. 18:28, 10 March 2008 (UTC)Grazon
  • Yeah...what he said....buck fush--Slappy 19:46, 10 March 2008 (UTC)

Springtime In CaliforniaEdit


  • Welcome to the one square mile of California which hasn't been ravaged by wildfires, floods, earthquakes, droughts, gay marriage, or Nancy Pelosi. --Careax 05:59, 7 March 2008 (UTC)

Hostesses Prepare For ConferenceEdit


Iranian President, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Visits IraqEdit


  • "Why no head-dress? C'mon. If you had hair like mine you'd go commando-style too!" --Careax 14:29, 10 March 2008 (UTC)

NASA Unveils A New Mars RoverEdit


  • "Sit. Stay. Good boy!" --Careax 14:28, 10 March 2008 (UTC)
  • NASA engineer displays the international hand signal for "Get Your Ass To Mars." - The Lake Effect 15:41, 14 March 2008 (UTC)

Barack Hussein Obama Wins Democrat Wyoming CaucusesEdit


  • Wyoming? Well why not oming? 00:23, 9 March 2008 (UTC)Grazon
  • "I'm so happy. Not only am I the first black guy to win in Wyoming, I'm the first black guy to ever visit Wyoming!" --Careax 14:27, 10 March 2008 (UTC)

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