Coen Brothers Win Academy AwardsEdit
- Russ Lieber steals an award from the Cohen brothers. 19:00, 25 February 2008 (UTC)Grazon
- Both Coen brothers were later tackled to the floor by actress Ellen Page, on account of "those two muthafuckas didn't deserve what Juno shoulda won!" Quotes obtained from an insider.
Image Of Barack Hussein Obama From 2006 Trip To Africa DiscoveredEdit
- Mwa, ha, ha! With this picture, Clinton will surely win the Democrat primary. May the Goddess be with us. --22.214.171.124 02:15, 26 February 2008 (UTC)
- You hear that noise? It's the sound over every freeper in America having an orgasm. 02:21, 26 February 2008 (UTC)Grazon
- "So I just play this flute and snakes will start dancing out of wicker baskets, eh?" --Careax 08:57, 26 February 2008 (UTC)
- "I must remind you that we don't recommend this ritual for those with arthritis, pregnant women, and people running for President of the United States of America." - The Lake Effect 22:50, 26 February 2008 (UTC)
Police Dogs In Germany Get ShoesEdit
- Our new show: "Animals Close-Up With a Wide-Angle Lens Wearing Shoes"--126.96.36.199 19:04, 26 February 2008 (UTC)
5,500 Year-old Structure Found In PeruEdit
- Larry King's long lost birthplace finally rediscovered. --Careax 08:48, 26 February 2008 (UTC)
American Student Starved While Studying In EgyptEdit
- go buy some food. --Slappy 02:32, 28 February 2008 (UTC)
- The dreadful truth behind Slim-Fast.
Cuba's New President, Raul Castro Meets With Vatican OfficialEdit
- "You want to smell some Cuban smoke? Pull my finger!" --Careax 18:00, 1 March 2008 (UTC)
- Sneek peek of the new Hollywood blockbuster: Mr. Magoo goes to the Vatican. --Careax 18:25, 3 March 2008 (UTC)
Ghana's President Gets To Meet The Greatest President EverEdit
- No I'm not your uncle and if you ask me about rice one more times I'm kicking your pale ass chimpy! 04:09, 29 February 2008 (UTC)Grazon
- Ghana's president, John Kufour, objects to The Greatest President Ever's nickname for him: Principal Blackman.--WatchTVEatDonutDrinkBeer
- "For the last time President Bush, I don't want to hear about Condi's huge ass!" --Careax 18:23, 3 March 2008 (UTC)
Two Fighter Jets Crash Over Gulf Of MexicoEdit
Two F-15 Eagles did crash during training exercises, just not the two pictured.
Britain's Prince Harry Secretly Deployed In Afghanistan For Three MonthsEdit
- If I knee his donkey will I have Royaly kicked his ass? 20:28, 28 February 2008 (UTC)Grazon
- Dear grandmama: This war has made me a man.
- "Nice ass kid. Reminds me of my step-mother." --Careax 18:18, 3 March 2008 (UTC)
Gas Leak May Have Caused Explosion In Illinois Shopping CenterEdit
- The kind of "blowout sale" you DON'T want to be at! --Careax 17:57, 1 March 2008 (UTC)