Attorney General Gonzales Takes Oath Prior to Testifying Before SenateEdit


  • "Dear God, Please don't let my stomach start cramping "--Colberican 23:55, 19 April 2007 (UTC)
  • "Senator, I do not recall if my right hand is raised." --El Payo 06:50, 23 April 2007 (UTC)

Attorney General Gonzales Testifies Before SenateEdit


"Yes that's right, I'm a woman. A really ugly woman. I'd have thought the girlie voice would have given it away by now!" --Careax 04:20, 20 April 2007 (UTC)

"Who am I? Why am I here?" --El Payo 06:50, 23 April 2007 (UTC)

World Bank Chief, Paul WolfowitzEdit


"I told her it would fit easily but she insisted I didn't go any further, I could even spread my fingers like this." -Kobayashi

"I did NOT have sex with that woman... She wanted to... but..." --Alethic Logic 15:50, 13 April 2007 (UTC)

" My socks don't have any holes in them this time, so stop saying i'm cheap --Colberican 18:06, 13 April 2007 (UTC)

Rudy Giuliani and Bernard KerikEdit


Rudy Giuliani sneaks up on Bernard Kerik to play a friendly game of "Freeze" --Alethic Logic 17:12, 13 April 2007 (UTC)

Rudy isn't buying into the homosexual agenda, clearly you can see--Colberican 18:06, 13 April 2007 (UTC)

"Please say that's a gun muzzle you have pointing in my lower back Rudy!" --Careax 15:08, 14 April 2007 (UTC)

America's Jolliest PimpEdit


Snoop fights back the tears after realizing someone stole his Huggy Bear novelty bong. --Careax 02:05, 19 April 2007 (UTC)

Chinese CelebrationEdit


America's jolliest pimp is stoned - he's the one on the left. --Alethic Logic 04:30, 18 April 2007 (UTC)

Millions die in China. On a lighter note, Chinese monument made of human bones is unvieled today...Tourskin 04:31, 18 April 2007 (UTC)

The Chinese erect a monument dedicated to Tenacious D.

A PeacockEdit


"Yeah, I'm still proud... even though our top-rated show is Deal or No Deal". --OHeL 01:34, 19 April 2007 (UTC)

2007 Half Moon Bay Surfing Competition CancelledEdit


Moses always has an edge in local surfing competitions. --Alethic Logic 15:01, 18 April 2007 (UTC)

Steve Jobs Shows Off New iPhoneEdit


"Beam me up Scottie!" --Careax 02:02, 19 April 2007 (UTC)

  • "iPhones can only be used to call iFriends. Your friends will require substantial hardware upgrades." - The Lake Effect 13:20, 19 April 2007 (UTC)

People... just... look at it. Magnificient. So... magnificient.

New Regional Crime Laboratory Opens in L.A.Edit

I forget, are we supposed to prevent regional crime, or make more of it? - The Lake Effect 03:49, 19 April 2007 (UTC)

Iran Holds Annual "Army Day" ParadeEdit


We call this plant "Mahmoud-Audrey-Junior-Jihad". --OHeL 01:49, 19 April 2007 (UTC)

Mahmoud announces his new army of Audrey Juniors, who will feast on the bodies of Western infidels. --Careax 02:01, 19 April 2007 (UTC) (dang you just beat me to it with the Audrey Jr. reference!)

"Like this plant, the Holocaust isn't real." --MC Esteban™ 02:31, 19 April 2007 (UTC)

"The Ugly Duckling of Crocuses" - The Lake Effect 13:13, 19 April 2007 (UTC)

Iranian cruise line unveils new dining room centerpiece. --Alethic Logic 14:28, 19 April 2007 (UTC)

Mahmoud Ahmadinejad laying wreath at Lilly Langtree memorial--Goldenporker 15:31, 19 April 2007 (UTC)

  • Hmm.. I wonder who got voted off of American Idol --Colberican 23:50, 19 April 2007 (UTC)

"Feed Me, Seymour!" --El Payo 06:53, 23 April 2007 (UTC)

President Bush Speaks At Ohio High SchoolEdit


  • Usually I stick my head up my own ass. This is a refreshing change of pace. - The Lake Effect 19:14, 19 April 2007 (UTC)

"Your brain is functioning normally, Sir." --OHeL 22:08, 19 April 2007 (UTC)

  • "I always wondered what blood-soaked underwear smelled like!" - The Lake Effect 23:43, 19 April 2007 (UTC)
We now know the answer to this after watching the Meta-Free-For-All! - The Lake Effect 04:21, 20 April 2007 (UTC)
  • Hey why is this fool sniffing my butt --Colberican 23:50, 19 April 2007 (UTC)
  • When the President talks foreign policy... people listen. --Alethic Logic 02:06, 20 April 2007 (UTC)

"Yeah I know he's kissing my butt. But it's Tony Blair. WHat else do you expect?" --Careax 06:09, 20 April 2007 (UTC)

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