University Denies Award to Jeb BushEdit

Please Give Jeb Bush An Award


Katherine Harris's penis? About yay big. --MC Esteban 21:29, 24 March 2007 (UTC)

Now just a minute - you saying that I can't graduate from High School?Tourskin 04:12, 25 March 2007 (UTC)

Jeb shows off his mad Mr. Roboto dance skills. --Careax 16:36, 25 March 2007 (UTC)

When I'm president, I'll be gettin' a White House chef who knows how to make them foot-long hotdogs... --Alethic Logic 21:40, 25 March 2007 (UTC)

"The best thing about Florida is, we got the mamacita like... jou know?" Factbook 17:34, 29 March 2007 (UTC)

Uhhhhhhhhhhhh.... Beavis, you suck. The Man in Black 13:51, 30 March 2007 (UTC)

One of the World's Smallest OwlsEdit


o rly?--MC Esteban 21:27, 24 March 2007 (UTC)

Hugo Chavez displays Venezuela's latest export: the novelty thumb-warmer. --Careax 00:42, 26 March 2007 (UTC)

World's largest tumour. The Man in Black 13:51, 30 March 2007 (UTC)

UCLA Bruins Defeat Stephen Colbert's Pick To Win NCAA TournamentEdit


Don't let the cute mascot fool you. These Bruins will kill you. --El Payo 01:33, 25 March 2007 (UTC) GO BRUINS! 'Go Bruins!' is not intended as an endorsement of bears.

Bear revolt only 5 years away!

What the unsuspecting public don't realize is there's a real bear under that foam costume! --Careax 16:41, 25 March 2007 (UTC)

In a surprisingly candid step, UCLA officially change their nickname to the Godless Killing Machines. --Careax 16:41, 25 March 2007 (UTC)

I tell ya, I tell ya... even reincarnated as a bear I can't get no respect! Factbook 19:28, 25 March 2007 (UTC)

I pledge to choke and allow a team from The Greatest President Ever's favorite state win.--WatchTVEatDonutDrinkBeer 03:01, 1 April 2007 (UTC)

Commander of HMS Cornwall in Persian GulfEdit

Commander Nick Lambert answers questions from the media regarding 15 sailors being held by Iran.


"Mr. Bean goes to war" - coming to theaters near you - Summer 2007. --Alethic Logic 01:52, 26 March 2007 (UTC)

"Well, you see, weee can't doooo anythink until the Queen says sooooo."Tourskin 05:34, 28 March 2007 (UTC)

Commander Nick Lambert demonstrates, to journalists, the function of a Poop Deck. --The Man in Black 13:56, 30 March 2007 (UTC)

Alberto Gonzales Answers QuestionsEdit


"You mention those attorneys one more time and BAM! I'll bust a cap in yo ass bitch!" --Careax 06:57, 27 March 2007 (UTC)

"You're fired"Tourskin 05:32, 28 March 2007 (UTC)

Harlequin Looking For Real MenEdit


Marlboro man prepares for balls-enhancement surgery. --Alethic Logic 15:34, 27 March 2007 (UTC)

Photoshoot for the cover of Harlequin's newest title, Stemming the Rose: The Brokeback Mountain Movie Novel. --MC Esteban™ 10:19, 29 March 2007 (UTC)

Ryan Seacrest eagerly greases himself up for another encounter with an unsuspecting cowboy. --Careax 06:45, 30 March 2007 (UTC)

Albino Baby WallabyEdit


Mutant rabbit flashes its bizarre genitalia. --Careax 06:54, 27 March 2007 (UTC)

A Tree Was Uprooted By Strong Winds in Los AngelesEdit


Internet troll headquarters discovered. --Alethic Logic 15:32, 30 March 2007 (UTC)

It's War of the Worlds all over again.

Concerned that his tree was not putting out enough leaves, local homeowner checks underneath to see if it's still plugged in. "Nope, there's the problem, it ain't getting any electricity." -Alan Smithe

Two Giant PandasEdit


If you have sex with your clone, isn't it technically "masturbation"? --Alethic Logic 00:05, 29 March 2007 (UTC)

You can't spell "panda" without "PDA"! --Kudzu 07:43, 30 March 2007 (UTC)

Philippine President Arroyo With Largest Fruit ShortcakeEdit


Four-Square productions introduces sequel "Attack of the Killer Strawberries". --Alethic Logic 23:57, 28 March 2007 (UTC)

Arroyo knights Stephen Colbert's left nut. --Alethic Logic 00:03, 29 March 2007 (UTC)

"I hereby dub thee Sir Strawberrylicious." --El Payo 22:58, 1 April 2007 (UTC)

From the red-hot gates of hell,... I STABBETH THEE!!!

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