Young Islamic Preachers Go On TVEdit


  • "...and remember folks, neuter your pets to control the animal overpopulation. Don't do drugs, stay in school. And don't forget to recycle your recyclables... oh, and death to America..." --Mutopis 14:27, 31 December 2008 (UTC)
  • "Soon as this cameras off I'm going to slap my newest wife." --Grazon 08:19, 1 January 2009 (UTC)

Violence Continues In Gaza StripEdit


  • Good news, they just lowered our rent!! --Mutopis 14:28, 31 December 2008 (UTC)

Malibu Beach Disappearing Due To Rising Sea LevelsEdit


  • "Beach Under Construction. Sorry for the inconvenience." --Mutopis 23:07, 1 January 2009 (UTC)

New York Rings In The New YearEdit


  • God dammit!!! Stop soiling the streets!!! --Mutopis 23:03, 1 January 2009 (UTC)

120th Rose Parade, Photo #1Edit

Grand Marshall Cloris Leachman


  • OMG! Its horrible!!! --Mutopis 23:03, 1 January 2009 (UTC)
  • Moments later, someone shouted "Blucher" and the horses pulling the float raced down the street leaving carnage in their wake.--WatchTVEatDonutDrinkBeer 07:55, 4 January 2009 (UTC)
Eye-Gore strikes again! --Grazon 05:56, 6 January 2009 (UTC)

120th Rose Parade, Photo #2Edit


  • Another Gay parade --Mutopis 23:03, 1 January 2009 (UTC)
  • I'm inviting them all to my sexy party! --Grazon 17:05, 2 January 2009 (UTC)

Health Clubs Struggle To Maintain Membership During RecessionEdit


  • The economy is receding! So should your waistline! What are you waiting for? Starvation? Atenea del Sol 20:48, 4 January 2009 (UTC)
  • failed jocks may now have to get real jobs. --Grazon 02:33, 10 January 2009 (UTC)

Gambling In Small Nevada Town Drying Up With RecessionEdit


Hookerville BJ's not yet at half price. --Grazon 03:23, 5 January 2009 (UTC)

Russia Blocks Natural Gas Pipelines Running Through UkraineEdit

These pipelines provide fuel for Poland, Romania, Hungary and Bulgaria[1]


Cities Reporting Bedbug InfestationsEdit


  • Another Republican caught in another bribery scandal --Mutopis 17:19, 5 January 2009 (UTC)

Thousands Of Shoes Litter Florida HighwayEdit


  • You hear that girls? free shooooes. --Grazon 19:34, 5 January 2009 (UTC)
  • Thousands of people get raptured --Mutopis 17:20, 5 January 2009 (UTC)

U.S. Funds Distributed To Assist Cities With ForeclosuresEdit


New Law Ends Public Access Television In CaliforniaEdit


  • But I was about to bring in the puppets! --Grazon 07:30, 6 January 2009 (UTC)
  • "As we celebrate mediocrity all the boys upstairs want to see how much you'll pay for what you used to get for free." --Randroid 05:39, 9 January 2009 (UTC)

College Students Hold First Quidditch Tournament Last OctoberEdit


The Greatest American Monarchy Ever Loses A PetEdit

The Bush's 18-year old family cat, India, passes


  • Barney was done with the cat, he knew what to do about it... --Mutopis 22:44, 7 January 2009 (UTC)

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