Willie Nelson

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Al Franken
Willie Nelson has earned
Willie Nelson
was interviewed as a guest of The Colbert Report, got nailed,
performed a song and got nailed again!
"Willie Nelson"
is hippie-related, and not groovy to The Baby Jesus.

Stoned out of his gourd.


Willie Nelson filling his truck-shaped bong with corn-water

Willie 'Wheatie' Nelson is an American Country-Western singer, and Stephen's Stoned Friend. He was Stephen's guest on the March 20, 2007 edition of The Colbert Report.

Nelson is known for his touring pansy-fueled, orgy bus, from which Toby Keith barely escaped with his butt-kickin' boots and his full, supple, womanly lips.

Nelson's crimes are not mitigated by Keith's "narc-issistic" personality, however.

Nelson will have plenty of time to contemplate his past liberal crimes in the newest camp at Gitmo, "Camp Chong".

Willie Nelson TriviaEdit

  • Willie is a bio-sexual
  • Willie smoked the country of Norius. Never heard of Norius? Exactly.
  • Willie has a Ben & Jerry ice cream flavor, Willie Nelson's Country Peach Cobbler. It is made of shredded tax forms and hash.
  • Willie has more THC in his system than a glaucoma-suffering Rastafarian in Amsterdam.
  • Willie's Visine bottles and bills are enormous
  • Willie' Got a contact sober off of Stephen Colbert when Stephen visited his tour bus
  • Willie’s so mellow, if the Buddha ever met him, he’d be like, ‘Whoa, that dude is laid back.’”
  • Willie has written and recorded songs about homosexuality and is known to tell pedophile jokes.

Famous Quotes Edit

"It's a good thing we had a bag of marijuana and not a bag of spinach, 'cause we'd all be dead by now."

Willie Nelson
makes satanic music
which are lullabies to the Baby Satan

Things Willie Doesn't DeclareEdit

  • taxable income
  • wheat in his ice cream

See AlsoEdit

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