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White House Press Secretary

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ATTENTION: This Page is for Real Americans™ ONLY
If you are not a Real American™, pack your bags and report to GITMO.
Rose Mary Woods

A secretary, but not a Press Secretary. However, she did press something very important once.

The Press Secretary is the mouthpiece for whichever presidential administration is in office. The Secretary's job is to parse out information to, and act as a buffer between administration officials and the Press Corps.

Believing what the Press Secretary has to say depends on which party is in office. For instance, the past three people to hold the position, Ari Fleischer, Scott McClellan and Tony Snow, have been forthright and honest in all dealings with the press.

After Snow was named to the position, Stephen Colbert revealed on May 2, 2006 that he had really wanted the job, having gone so far as to make an audition tape.

Usually it's from the press where the dishonesty stems. The Press Corp uses and abuses their Secretary like a piece of meat, always asking inappropriate questions or making disrespectful comments. They'll even slap the Secretary’s ass as they walk by, just to demean the person because that's how they get their kicks. This is one of the reasons why President George W. Bush has had to fill the position twice since he's been in office.

The Press Secretary answers questions from the press corp in the White House Briefing Room, which smells like Blitzer's beard.Episode #369

Stephen's Nominees For Press SecretaryEdit

See The Press Secretary In ActionEdit

Press Secretary Alumni AssociationEdit

See AlsoEdit

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