Wendy Kopp
has been a guest of The Colbert Report
and got nailed in the process


Wendy sees her group as the way to acheive NCLB, Hallelujah!

Word Problem #1

If a communist goes on The Report to discuss a program that she says works, but has never participated in herself, and is unnecessary since The Greatest President Ever already has given us No Child Left Behind, how long will it take before she gets nailed?

(Please show all your work)


Kopp is not a doctor.


WORD PROBLEM What should Stephen call Wendy Kopp given that her life story is similar to Michelle Pfeiffer's and Edward James Olmos', she is not a doctor, and thinks "2 years" is a commitment?

a) "Spinster"
b) Whore Who Teaches Other People's Children
c) "Miss"
d) the future "Mister Mary Cheney"


If a student graduates college and wants to contribute to American society, what is the best field to get into?

a) marriage, to make good American families

b) business, to make a lot of money

c) teaching, let kids know you can only for 2 years

d) get your own TV show, and teach America using your gut

If a woman wants to live her entire lonely life without a husband or family, what can she do?

a) work outside the home runnning a company she created

b) interrupt a man who is interviewing you and is way more successful than anyone who has ever read books will ever be.

c) be a communist

d) all of the above

If a woman runs a company she created, how can you tell if she has latent communist tendencies?

a) blathers on and on about how kids need "equal opportunities"

b) insists those who have experience should give back to those who would most benefit from that experience

c) whines that innercity children could benefit from book-learning

d) lives by the motto: "Do as I say, not as I do."



Michele Pfeiffer or Edward James Olmos

SC also teaches for america

she validated SC

why are the younguns hot for it

why is this needed? We already have no child left behind

only way we are going to get there is to channel leadership abilities

those people should be out making money

thinks 2 years is a committment


equal ed opportunities

eliminate school for everyone

levels the playing field

no reading books at all no one gets ahead

If teacher Emily Barton has 120 math students who all start the 7th grade at the 5th grade level and after a year are now at the 8th grade level, how often does Stephen Colbert think about her?

If Scott Wolf begins teaching at a school that has a 42% proficient rate and after 2 years are now at a 95% proficient rate, how pissy can Wendy make herself look by ignoring Stephen's very funny Party of Five jokes?

If there are 13 million kids in the United States living in poverty, only half of which will graduate from high school at an 8th grade school level, wouldn't it be better for none of them to have gone to school to begin with? Aren't books the real problem here?


do as i say not as i do

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