Wedding Season should be the time when one man and one woman prepare to enter the bonds of holy matrimony, as ordained by God in the scriptures. In a wedding ceremony, before God and the assembled guests, the woman (bride) and man (groom) declare that until death do them part, she will be his property.
In the hideous, vile, blasphemous, evil, sinful abomination of this act, two homosexuals will attempt to usurp God's holy plan by holding a "Gay Weddings". In a Gay Wedding, a man and another man, or two women, or (in the least offensive configuration) a man and a snake declare their shameful love before their guests and Nancy Pelosi.
Both types of wedding parties should visit CDC.gov Wedding Registry for helpful planning tips.