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Baby Jesus
The Baby Jesus and The Baby Satan
are fighting over the very soul of
Avril lavigne the vampire

A modern day Canadian Vampire. [1]

Vampires are faux-conservatives. They appear as conservatives by day, but they transformed into liberals at night. Vampirism, the condition of being a vampire, is a sexually transmitted disease invented by the forces of darkness and is spread by neck-biting or by having gay-sex. Vampires keep true Republicans from doing there public duty by biting their necks and sucking out their blood. The worst part about this is when the suck out a true Republican, they turn them into faux-conservative vampires like themselves and it is extremely difficult to tell faux-conservatives apart from true conservatives.

Signs of Vampirism Edit

  • Claiming to be conservative, but vote for pork barrel projects.
  • Claiming to be conservative, but have gay-sex with anonymous individual in airport bathroom.
  • Claiming to be conservative, but gay-seduce young pages and interns.
  • Claiming to be conservative, but vote against tax cuts.
  • Claiming to be conservative, but employ illegal aliens.

Known Vampires Edit

Vampire Reunion02:16

Vampire Reunion


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