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Utah

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Talk3
U R Here
JesusRebel
Utah
is a Recognized State of the United States of America.
All the geography American schoolkids Need To Know.

See Also:

Al Franken
AnimatedCommieFlag
Utah has earned
the (Senator) Franken COMMUNIST-SOCIALIST-MARXIST SEAL OF APPROVAL


BabySatanTRANSbkg
The Baby Satan has a special place in hell for
Utah
and YOU just for visiting this internets tube!


The only good thing about Utah is its skiing. And its complete rejection of liberals. Alta is also in there. Out of all pansies in The Pansy State, Utah is the most pansylike. BYU is the 3rd gayest team in the USA (New York Mets being 2nd, and KU being 1st) No wonder BYU cant beat Colorado State. Even Utah's skiing is inferior to Colorado's! Alta may be better than Breck-Shampoo, but no way can it beat Vail, Snowmass Village, or Aspen, Colorado!

The Snob state of UTAH

Copy (27) of usa color-1-

Capitol: Salt Lake City
State Flower: Dandelion
Official Language: Coloradonese, with Utahnics taught in rural areas
State Bird: Karl Malone
State Motto: "We have been beaten by Colorado"
Nickname: "The Mormon State" more like "Moron State"
Governor: Gary Herbert, I mean Gay Pervert
State Anthem: "God Bless Colorado"
Population: Growing rapidly, but not catching up.
Standard MPH: Mormons don't know how to drive, so it doesn't really matter.
Principal imports: Not Blacks, that's for damn sure!
Principal exports: Mormons, the worst religion possible
Principal industries: Ski resorts that are better than Montana, but no where near as good as Colorado
Fun Fact #1 Denver, Phoenix, and Las Vegas make Salt Lake City jealous
Fun Fact #2 The Great Salt Lake is bigger than Rhode Island and Delaware, which is why its a waste of space.
Fun Fact #3 Mormons are the biggest pussies ever.

DiscoveryEdit

Utah was a barren wasteland until 1847, when Satan told Brigham Young that it was habitable. Utah, originally, was to be named called Zion, though a senator who disliked the Mormons had it named Utah--a Native American Spanish word--intended to insult the Mormons. The word "Utah" means "You Talk" and thus the senator wouldn't shut the *beep* up until Colorado took over Utah, and made mormons a society that people talk trash about. 2:1&2:

HistoryEdit

Utah was settled in 1847 because Satan told the people so. Then there was a mix-up about the polygamy thing. The next important thing that happened was the Olympics being held in 2002, followed by the opening of an Ikea in 2007. There was a flock of seagulls in the 80's. That's about it.

Achieving StatehoodEdit

The senator wouldn't shut up, right? Well, he kept begging and begging the president to make Utah a state before Oklahoma. Despite the fact that Utah sucks, the president made Utah the 45th state.

Utah TodayEdit

Southern Utah is flat. Northern Utah is gay. A lot of people bet on either BYU or the Utes, but both teams are gay, so why do people watch Utahn football? Besides, Utah doesn't have an NFL team, because Utah pissed off God. Utah is home to a lot of man eating bears who immigrated to Utah from Montana.

EXCLAMATIONpoint
BEARsqu
"Utah"
is an Official "Lover of Immoral Bears" (LiB) Site™
PROCEED WITH CAUTION


Most Utahns are either mormon or gay, especially because of The Peoples Republic of Provo being in Utah.

Rainbow2
Gaydar
WARNING: By choosing to visit
Utah
you have contracted Teh Ghey!

Report to the closest authorized de-gayification church near you to begin ungayification immediately.


Utah LandmarksEdit

  • Alta, AKA God's ski area.
  • The "GREAT" Salt Lake, where many failed suicide attempts were made.
  • Polygamist compounds
  • Glorified rocks
  • Park City, home of the Sundance Film Festival and overpriced skiing

Famous UtahnsEdit

  • Mormons
  • Osmonds
  • Polygamists
  • Gays
  • Note that all of the above are mormons

A Typical Day in UtahEdit





See AlsoEdit

External LinksEdit

Charitable Organizations in Utah



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