The Pledge of Allegiance

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If you are not a Real American™, pack your bags and report to GITMO.
Baby Jesus
The Pledge of Allegiance
Makes The Baby Jesus™ Happy
And that Makes Stephen happy, too!

Great Flag Greatest Flag

The Pledge was invented when George W. Bush went back in time and told everybody how awesome America was. Back then, everyone agreed with him. Thus was the Pledge born. Unfortunately, Democrats have been trying to kill the Pledge for years.

Why We Say the PledgeEdit

We in America say the Pledge of Alleigance WITH the words "under God" to piss off left wing homosexual atheists. And Lutherans.

Stephen Colbert said the Pledge while saluting a flag flown in Operation: Beefhammer.

Saying the Pledge, written by socialist preacher Francis Bellamy, is a great way to protest socialized medicine.

Is Now A Good Time?Edit

With tsunamis, earthquakes, wars, and terrorism around every corner is now really a good time to take God out of America's solemn oath to her beloved flag?

Really, do we wanna piss Him off any more?

People Who Hate the PledgeEdit

Pledge 2.0Edit

I text allegiance
to the flag
of the United States
Of American Apparel
and to the facebook
for which it friends,
one nation,
with Liberty and Jonas for all.

Pledge MeatEdit

I pledge allegiance
to the meats
of the United Steaks
of America.
And to the ribeye
for which it broils,
one bacon,
under God,
with liver and onions for all.

States have Pledges TooEdit

Texas has a pledge for its flag. Created in 1933, it was revised in June 2007 to correct a glaring omission, God:

Honor the Texas flag; I pledge allegiance to thee, Texas, one state under God, one and indivisible.

But based on the Joint Resolution for Annexing Texas and The Ordinance of Annexation, Texas is, in fact, divisible and . may form up to four additional states. Thus, a more accurate Texas Pledge would read: Honor the Texas flag; I pledge allegiance to thee, Texas, one state under God, one but divisible by five or less.

Other States With PledgesEdit

"I pledge allegiance to the flag of Michigan,
and to the state for which it stands,
2 beautiful peninsulas united by a bridge of steel,
where equal opportunity and justice to all is our ideal."

"Flag of Alabama I salute thee. To thee I pledge my allegiance, my service, and my life."

I salute the flag of Mississippi
and the sovereign state for which it stands
with pride in her history and achievements
and with confidence in her future under the guidance of Almighty God.

"I pledge allegiance to the flag of the state of Louisiana
and to the motto for which it stands:
A state, under God, united in purpose and ideals,
confident that justice shall prevail for all of those abiding here."

"I pledge allegiance to the Kentucky flag,
And to the Sovereign State for which it stands,
One Commonwealth, blessed with diversity, natural wealth, beauty,
And grace from on High."

To create a pledge for the other state flags, click here

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