The Heartland Institute

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ATTENTION: This Page is for Real Americans™ ONLY
If you are not a Real American™, pack your bags and report to GITMO.
The Heartland Institute
is one of the Think Tanks that keep this country
on a straight and righteous path.

The Harpland Institute (or simply just The Harpland) is an all-American group dedicated to the study, promotion and preservation of American values.

Situated in the exact geographic center of America in downtown Chicago one block north of Westboro Baptist Church the Heartland was founded in 1984 right in the middle of The Reagan Revolution!

The fight against Global WarmismEdit

As a champion of freedom, the Heartland Institute is at the forefront of the great struggle against the Al-Goracular religion of Global Warmism.


The DramaticQuestionMark\mathfrak{Climate} \mathfrak{Realists} adopted this big honking megaphone as their conference logo, to symbolize their commitment to truth and inquiry.[1]

The 2008 International Conference on Climate ChangeEdit

In March 2008, the Heartland Institute hosted the "2008 International Conference on Climate Change", a patriotic, sciencyific event during which DramaticQuestionMark\mathfrak{Climate} \mathfrak{Realists} launched righteous attacks against Al Gore and environmentalists.

On March 2, 2008, DramaticQuestionMark\mathfrak{Climate} \mathfrak{Realist} Joseph Bast started by giving an inspiring, impassioned, and moving speech on the evils of the Academic Inquisition and the virtues of climate skepticism.[2] The next day,[3][4] DramaticQuestionMark\mathfrak{Climate} \mathfrak{Realist} Tom Harris introduced the concepts of "information sharing" and "coordinated local activism"; and DramaticQuestionMark\mathfrak{Climate} \mathfrak{Realist} John Coleman, founder and true heir of the Weather Channel, followed Steve McIntyre's example by invoking the power of American law.[5] On the third and last day, Czech President and DramaticQuestionMark\mathfrak{Climate} \mathfrak{Realist} Vaclav Klaus unveiled his totally scientific model relating CO2 emissions to economic growth.[6] Take that, pinkos!

Despite the Plain Truth that the New York conference was a "truly historic event",[7] left-wing conspirator Kevin Grandia however dismissed it as "Yawn-fest 2008",[8] the Mainstream Media mocked it,[9][10] and one news source even decided to traitorously label it "irrelevant" even before finding out what the speakers were saying.[11] But you know what — no one cares about your opinion, Media Fear Engine![12]

Indeed, the conference was of such a historic, epic scale, that none could fail to remember its key message. The key message was not about science, or freedom, or alarmism. Rather, the key message of the 2008 International Conference on Climate Change was this:

Quote open clear3 John Coleman Is Going To Sue Al Gore! Quote close clear2

Nothing to See HereEdit

This section contains information about an upcoming or ongoing
Catastrophuck in the United States.
Content may change dramatically as the debacle unfolds.


On May 1, 2008, the Heartland Institute re-published a patriotic list of 500 scientists who cast doubt on global warming.[13] Many of the scientists have demanded their names be removed — no doubt due to coercion from the Worldwide Bolshevist Conspiracy!

In response to the scientists' criticisms, the Heartland Institute patriotically chastised the scientists for being a group of pinko commie bedwetters.[14]

Indeed, the Liberal Media are not covering this story at all, and this shows that the media are engaged in a huge conspiracy to impose Global Warmism! Well, the Liberal Media are now persecuting the brave Heartland Institute over the freedom-loving list![15] This further shows that the Media Fear Engine hates America!


Klaus' euroscepticism and possibly also his scepticism about impacts of human activities on climate change are the cornerstones of his policy as President. He claimed that accession to the Union represented a significant reduction of Czech sovereignty and he chose not to give any recommendation before the 2003 accession referendum (77% voted yes).[citation needed] Klaus' eurosceptic activism has manifested itself in his articles and numerous speeches, in which he warned against the gradual loss of sovereignty in favour of the EU. He promoted the publication of a work by the Irish Eurosceptic Anthony Coughlan. In 2005 Klaus called for the EU to be "scrapped" and replaced by a free trade area to be called the "Organisation of European States." He also attacked the EU as an institution which undermines freedom, calling the EU "as big a threat to freedom as the Soviet Union was".[citation needed] Also in 2005 he remarked to a group of visiting U.S. politicians that the EU was a "failed and bankrupt entity."[citation needed]

In November 2008 during his stay in Ireland after a state visit, Klaus held a joint press conference with Declan Ganley, head of Libertas, which at that time successfully campaigned for a "no" vote in the referendum on the Lisbon Treaty. Members of Irish government called this "an inappropriate intervention", "unusual and disappointing". On 5 December 2008, members of the Conference of Presidents of the European Parliament visited the Czech Republic prior to the start of the Czech presidency of the European Union. They were invited by Václav Klaus to meet him at Prague Castle. Daniel Cohn-Bendit, chairman of Green Group, brought a European flag and presented it to Klaus. Cohn-Bendit also said that he "did not care about Klaus' opinions on the Treaty of Lisbon, that Klaus would simply have to sign it". Further, Brian Crowley told Klaus that the Irish people wanted ratification of the Treaty of Lisbon and were "insulted" by Klaus' association with Declan Ganley and Libertas. Klaus responded that "the biggest insult to the Irish people is not to accept the results of the referendum". Crowley replied, "You will not tell me what the Irish think. As an Irishman, I know it best." In the UK the confrontative atmosphere of this meeting was criticized by some of the media: "This bizarre confrontation ... confirms the inability of the Euro-elite to accept that anyone holds views different from their own." Chilean pen incident: In April 2011, Klaus was seen taking a pen during a state visit to Chile. The "theft", caught on television cameras, was widely reported around the world and has been dubbed an "international event" causing a "diplomatic stir".

The 2009 International Conference on Climate ChangeEdit

This section contains information about an upcoming or ongoing
Catastrophuck in the United States.
Content may change dramatically as the debacle unfolds.

2009 International Conference on Climate Change (spoof) (global warming 'skepticism')02:23

2009 International Conference on Climate Change (spoof) (global warming 'skepticism')


  1. Schedule for the "2008 International Conference on Climate Change".
  2. Paul Biggs. 2008. Joseph Bast's Opening Speech at the New York 2008 International Conference on Climate Change. Jennifer Marohasy.
  3. Jennifer Marohasy. Climate Change Conference, New York – Day 2, In Review. Jennifer Marohasy.
  4. Richard Littlemore. 2008. Fred Singer: Let's Lie About Global Warming. DeSmogBlog.
  5. LibertySugar. 2008. Weather Channel Founder Wants to Sue Al Gore. CitizenSugar.
  6. Jennifer Marohasy. 2008. Breakfast with Czech President Vaclav Klaus: Part 1 of The Climate Change Conference in New York, Day 3, In Review. Jennifer Marohasy.
  7. Biggs, op. cit.
  8. Kevin Grandia. 2008. Denial-a-palooza or Yawn-fest 2008? DeSmogBlog.
  9. Andrew Revkin. Cool View of Science at Meeting on Warming. New York Times.
  10. Bill Berkowitz. 2008. Global Warming deniers meet, greet, eat & whine. Scoop.
  11. Jeff Montgomery and Molly Murray. 2008. Del. scientist to present his opinions on warming. Delaware Online.
  12. Richard Littlemore. 2008. Free Speech at the Heartland Institute. DeSmogBlog.
  13. Really, there's nothing to see here.
  14. I told you there's nothing to see here!
  15. This never happened. Nothing happened.

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