The Five Stages Of Truthiness

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God Touching Adam
"The Five Stages Of Truthiness"
is Most Beloved by God over all His creations
Now and Forever, Amen.

The Five Stages Of Truthiness are the stages one goes through to become a member of the Colbert Nation and bask in the glow of Dr. Stephen T. Colbert, DFA's glorious, glorious balls.

Stage 1: LiberalismEdit

Defining Characteristics

  • denying the existence of God
  • reading
  • homosexuality
  • funding communist enterprises, such as food banks and soup kitchens

Stage 2: BargainingEdit

Defining Characteristics

  • rearranging your schedule to watch more TV

Stage 3: DenialEdit

Defining Characteristics

Stage 4: Acceptance Of Jesus Christ As Your Personal Lord And SaviorEdit

Defining Characteristics

Stage 5: AngerEdit

Defining Characteristics

  • the ability to become incensed at the mention of any liberal code word or the sound of Keith Olbermann's voice, just like Stephen does!

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