The Colbert Report/Episodes/EpGuide/Episode 387

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Production InfoEdit

Previous Episode
April 28, 2008
Production code:
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  • GM Used Corn & I Don't Care
"Ethanol solves the energy crisis! Is there any problem alcohol can't solve!?"
  • He Shouts He Scores
"Plus, I'll explore the world of sports! Don't worry: no hockey!"
  • The Feist and The Furious
"And my guest tonight is Feist! For anyone over 50, Nightline is also on!"

Flag quote open clear2
A great man once said, "This is The Colbert Report"! Wait, that was me!
This is
The Colbert Report.
Flag quote close clear2
~ Stephen Colbert
April 28, 2008 The Colbert Report

Stephen is HeartsickEdit

  • Hannah Montana is in Vanity Fair
    • she is embarrassed by her pictures
    • Annie Leibowitz
      • celebrities cannot resist her
  • Stephen was victimized by Anne Geddes
    • almost as traumatic as his Maplethorp Christmas Cards
      • you won't believe where he put the jingle bells

Howard Dean Shows Some SacEdit

  • Dean predicts the popular vote will not decide the nomination
    • just as Robert Mugabe
  • electability
    • Stephen didn't know John Kerry was electable in 2004
    • they need it unless they don't want to turn into Howard Dean

Climate ChangeEdit

  • Stephen is concerned because people won't shut up about it
  • corn+magic=gasoline
  • Royal Society of Chemistry
    • ethanol is not efficient
  • Tonight's word: Kernel of Truth

Sport reportEdit

  • Shave off your body hair and get in the sweat box!
    • NFL Draft
  • Stihl Timbersports Championship
    • from New Zealand
      • New Zealand is Diet Australia
  • Met-Rx Strong Man Competition is dominated by Iceland, but they can't deadlift their island out of the North Atlantic
  • Stephen won't sit back as foreigners outrape our natural resources!


  • Feist
    • Dr. Colbert discovered her in an out-of-the way club he calls "an iPod commercial"
  • Dr. Colbert wore the pantsuit she gave him as he introduced her performance of I Feel It All


After guest Feist finished her song, Dr. Colbert returned wearing the sparkly blue pantsuit she gave him as a gift to thank her and say good night to the heroes.


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