The Colbert Report/Episodes/EpGuide/Episode 338

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Production InfoEdit

Previous Episode
January 16, 2008
Production code:
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No statement of truth, show started with theme and opening graphics.


Presents From Primary StatesEdit

  • American half gloves, from Jan, from Midland, Michigan

Michigan PrimariesEdit

  • Mitt Romney won
  • clock was running out
    • "Tonight marks the beginning of a comeback" (NYTimes)
  • Dr. Colbert called Michigan for Romney
    • more money than everyone else there
    • used to live there
    • Michigan is shaped like a mitten=MItt

First Rule: voters always go for the candidate whose name is the shape of their state (Tip O'Neil said: "All politics is local shapes")

Comeback For HillaryEdit

  • McLaughlin Group explains:
    • maternal instinct
    • tribal impulses of Women

Democrat Debate In NevadaEdit

  • Hillary's new campaign platform
    • "Hillary for President: What Barack Said"
  • first Primary in The West
  • Benjamin Eckstein
    • a bookie
    • oddsmaker
    • refused to take a bet for Stephen (the only illegal thing in Las Vegas)
    • called 3-way tie
  • Dr. Colbert asks The Heroes not to bet on the spin of the Roulette Wheel of Truth
    • to determine the winner of the Democrat Primary of Nevada
    • when the ball falls out of the wheel it means Mike Gravel won
    • clock gobbler
  • Barack Hussein Obama
  • Dr. Colbert will predict GOP winner tomorrow

The Writers StrikeEdit

  • all late-night guys are lumped together
    • Dr. Colbert is a newsman, not in competition with the other guys
    • Conan pissed off Dr. Colbert by trying to take credit for The Colbert Bump that gave Iowa to Mike Huckabee
    • Dr. Colbert also said his chin would look good with a beard
  • Dr. Colbert made Mike Huckabee
    • breathed dust into him and fashioned him from mud (or something)
  • Dr. Colbert threatened to kick O'Brien's translucent white ass



Motherload VideosEdit

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