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The Colbert Report/Episode/580

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Production InfoEdit

FlyingEaglePREV
Previous Episode
Date:
June 30, 2009
Season:
Season5
Episode:
580
Production code:
5089
FlyingEagleNEXT
Next Episode


IntroEdit

Tonight
  • Gooooooooooooooal
"AUDIO1"
  • Get Carter
"AUDIO2"


Flag quote open clear2
Bernie look on the bright side: when you get out no one will expect a 200 year old man!
This is
The Colbert Report!
Flag quote close clear2
~ Stephen Colbert
June 30, 2009 The Colbert Report



SEGMENT1Edit

  • Dr. Colbert has bad news
  • Al Franken must be certified as a US Senator
  • the court rushed into the decision so soon
    • its' only been 7 months
    • so close after Michael Jackson's death, no one's thinking clearly
  • the state hadn't split in two yet
  • Coleman could have appealed to the Supreme Court
  • Mullahs in Iran could have come up with a different vote count
  • Franken gloated
    • what a fucking asshole

SEGMENT2Edit

  • Proud history being undermined
    • Benjamin Schroeder
      • suing city
  • pyrotechnics could last for weeks
    • won't have to bring pot to the celebration
  • Schroeder claims 4th of July may harm local wildlife
    • we liberated wildlife from the British

SEGMENT3Edit

  • Stephen never cared until we became good at it
    • US beat Spain 2-1
  • used a metaphor to describe the match
  • soccer is so ingrained in Brazilian culture
    • can't be born without having to get passed a goalie
  • after showing some exciting highlights, dr. Colbert awoke wondering if he had grown a beard
  • show team pride
    • PRO fun scarves
      • beer is warm and cost 3 pounds (plus 2 more for tax)
  • CON players must be in shape
  • CON low scores
  • PRO rioting
    • violence can break out at any time
  • transitive property of defeat America is champs of the world
  • why care about soccer
    • beautiful game
  • get the rest of the world to call it soccer
  • Grenada
  • Honduras
  • Haiti
  • later U.S. in Mexico
    • the U.S. has never won in Mexico
  • WE'RE GOING TO WIN THE WORLD CUP!

InterviewEdit

  • the speech was longer than the title of his book
  • July 15th, 1979
    • consumerism
    • dependence on foreign oil
  • Stephen would not say Carter
    • he's a Reagan man
  • Reagan Good! Carter Bad!
  • 2 days later he fired his entire cabinet
  • the book is about a speech
    • bumped up 11% in the polls
  • the original Blame America Firster
  • if your wife asks if her pants make her look fat, you don't tell her she looks fat
  • Reagan ripped solar panels off the White House
  • there were no words in the speech
  • America had a problems at the time
    • didn't feel good about herself
    • the pride came back with Reagan
  • with freedom, nothing is free
  • Carter: worst president? Or Worstest President?

EpilogueEdit

GalleryEdit

Official Truthy VideosEdit

External TubesEdit

  • [URL Link Title]
  • [URL Link Title]

Reviews and CommentsEdit

EmmyAwardWinningTCR2

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