The Colbert Report/Episode/499

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Production InfoEdit

Previous Episode
January 15, 2009
Production code:
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  • Press Rewind
"A look back on President Bush's relationship with the media! I wonder if tonight's the night they finally do it!?"
  • Animal Grouse
"Then, PETA launches a new wildlife protection campaign! I use "Noah's Rule": if there's more than two, they're not endangered!"
  • Fairey Dusted
"And my guest is Shepard Fairey, the artist behind the iconic Obama Hope poster! And they said we'd never elect a poster president!"

Flag quote open clear2
It's my way or the tollway! No free rides!
This is
The Colbert Report!
Flag quote close clear2
~ Stephen Colbert
January 15, 2009 The Colbert Report


  • Dr. Colbert is very emotional
    • soft-focus emotional
  • still sad, but young and beautiful
  • George W. Bush delivered his farewell address
    • Washington warned about foreign entanglements
    • Eisenhower warned about military industrial complex
    • Ambraham Lincoln gave half a theatre review
  • the press passed judgment while he was a candidate
  • when Bush was on Whose Line is It Anyway, Wayne Brady used a foreign accent and Bush had him sent to a Bulgarian prison
  • Jeff Gannon
    • turned out to be a ringer (Washington Beltway speak for "gay escort")
  • Helen Thomas was long time lover of both Stadtler and Waldorf
    • never learned it's rude to talk with a mouthful of questions
  • NBC's David Gregory
    • he memorizes four words and asks like he's intercontinental
    • when asking the Italian Prime Minister, Gregory sang his questions in opera
  • throwing your shoe in Iraq means (roughly)
    • I want to hit your head with a shoe

Looking Back On The Greatest Presidency EverEdit

  • with David Gregory
  • they greeted each other with a flurry of French phrases
    • however, Stretch is not allowed to kiss Dr. Colbert on both cheeks because Obama is not in office yet
  • decided that George W. Bush is a great president
  • Stephen is proud of the questions the media didn't ask
  • Bush is completely reflective because the questions bounce off him
  • press must prove they are not asleep at the wheel
    • honeymoon is over; go straight to the divorce

Tip of The Hat, Wag of the Finger!Edit

  • we are entering a new era of tolerance
  • Tip- to New York Mets
    • uniform patches for Yankees and Mets commemorating their new stadiums
  • Wag- Clearwater, Florida police


  • Shepard Fairey, artist and disobedient boy
    • artist behind the iconic Obama "Hope" poster, when Dr. Colbert is done, he'll know what it's like to be nailed to a wall
  • he is a criminal
    • claims to be a patriotic criminal
  • he is so rich he can retire and do no more art
  • he is proving that Obama is going to be socialist
  • he is also known for the Andre the Giant "Obey" stickers
  • causing people hardship by telling people to not obey the man
  • believes America was founded on dissent
  • "The Colbert Report" was named the number one show on television by Entertainment Weekly
    • Fairey drew Stephen's picture for the article in that same style as the Obama "Hope" poster


  • remember to have your pet spayed or neutered, because Dr. Colbert's pets are out there humping their brains out; good night!


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