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Stigmata

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Baby Jesus
FunSteve
Stigmata
Makes The Baby Jesus™ Happy
And that Makes Stephen happy, too!
Colbert-Stigmata

Only the truly holy are blessed with stigmata!

The sign of true Heavenly devotion, stigmata are God's way of marking his most favorite humans in the image of Jesus - post-crucifixion, when he was at his most awesomest!

Quote open clear3 Blessed are the bleeders, for they shall keep the blood banks nice and busy. Quote close clear2
~Saint Januarius, Patron Saint of Blood Banks


Here's how it works: when God sees someone who is genuinely holy and devout, he sends down an angel while they're asleep. The angel, armed with a large rusty old nail, knocks the lucky recipient out with a roofie, and then gets all "stabby" on their hands and feet.

The result is another satisfied customer!

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