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Steve Jobs is the person who can be credited with the creation of the Apple computer. Although his work from the 1970s to 1980s was commendable, his company eventually fired him because he was too un-American a person.
Life Saver (and other over-rated candy) Edit
Claims one of his co-workers: "I worked on the startup process for the Apple computer. One day Steve came up to me and said, 'Just make this startup program five seconds faster. That way, for every 378432000 people that use our computer, you'll save someone's life, just from speeding it up.'" Only thing is, only 1 person in the whole world uses Apple computers, that being Steve Jobs, because the Apple computer sucks.
Saving lives is not part of the American ideal, just as saving money is detrimental as well. Steve Jobs was fired and brought back only because he looks really cool when he holds an Apple iPod.
- As Stephen Colbert recently revealed, Steve Jobs has a
secrettime machine. It's the only rational explanation on how he knew to buy so much Apple stock.
- Steve is a member of the Democratic Eat Elephant Terd Party, which makes all Apple Computer products part of it also. Except the Iphone, as whatever Stephen touches or even thinks about becomes Republican
- To protect Apple's sekret patented technology, Jobs started the GestApple, an Apple Police organization to stop those hippies from stealing from hard working corporations.
- Use of Apple products can cause Macsturbation
- Apple to release the iPadXXX
- Apple trademarks everything
- anti-Sexting, there is an app for that