The Stephen Colbert Museum and Gift Shop
is just one of the many gifts the Dr. Stephen T. Colbert, D.F.A.
has bestowed upon all of humankind. Thank you Dr. Colbert, thank you.


Colbert County residents celebrate the Grand Opening of The Stephen Colbert Museum and Gift Shop.

The Stephen Colbert Museum and Gift Shop was an international tourist destina...eighth wonder of the world located in the economically depressed rural hellhole of Tuscumbia in Colbert County, Alabama.

The MuseumEdit

Hi Stephen Colbert! I love you man, I think you're the funniest person in the world and wish to subscribe to Formula 402. The museum was built with the help of donations from thousands of Heroes Like You™ and included a mock up of Stephen at his desk. It should have been a giant boom to the economy of Tuscumbia and Colbert County. It offered many exhibits and interactive features, along with an acoustic guide tour.


  • The Making of The Stephen Colbert Museum
  • The National Portrait Gallery
  • The Better Know A District Map
  • The Colbert Library
  • Video 'Salute To Stephen',

Interactive WingEdit

  • Take A Photo with Stephen Standee
  • Sit at Stephen's desk
  • Memory Book
  • Helen Keller's pump

The Gift ShopEdit

The gift shop offered a variety of Stephen Colbert-related items and accepted ColBucks as the sole source of payment.

Gift Shop ItemsEdit

  • Stephen Colbert Publicity Stills
  • Steagle The Stuffed Eagle plush toy
  • Limited Edition Colbert Nation Button
  • Formula 401 - $40.00/box
  • Stephen Colbert's Scorn
  • Colbert Report t-shirt in flag white or flag blue
  • Colbert Report coffee mug
  • Stage Manager Bobby's Skeleton

The Alabama MiracleEdit


Soon to be Emmy™ nominated for best mini-series.


He has a name: S-T-E-P-H-E-N C-O-L-B-E-R-T

The saga of the Museum was revealed in a three and a half part series on the November 28-30 editions of The Colbert Report, titled Alabama Miracle: The Making of Colbert County's The Stephen Colbert Museum & Gift Shop.

The Grand Opening ceremony featured marching bands, cheerleaders and a stirring re-enactment of the famous scene from The Miracle Worker in which Helen Keller signs her first words, "Stephen Colbert."

Stephen Colbert himself did not attend the opening of his museum, but he did make a “surprise appearance” via video to thank the massive, festive crowd for its support and for making this “one of the happiest tapes I’ve ever prerecorded.”

The Tragic ConclusionEdit


This is the way the dream dies. Not with a bang, but a stapler.

Tragically, one day after The Stephen Colbert Museum and Gift Shop's Grand Opening, the Joe Scarborough Museum and Gift Shop, The Scarboreum! opened. The people of Tuscumbia and Colbert County, balless wonders all, abandoned Stephen's Museum for the flashy new Scarboreum and its promise of "Everything Joe!"

The Stephen Colbert Museum and Gift Shop held a Grand Closing that day, complete with marching band and a ribbon-stapling ceremony presided over by Mayor Willie Shoemaker.

The residents of Tuscumbia and Colbert County, including Mayor Shoemaker are all now on notice.Episode #182

See AlsoEdit

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