Fandom

Wikiality

Sierra Club

12,424pages on
this wiki
Add New Page
Talk1 Share

Ad blocker interference detected!


Wikia is a free-to-use site that makes money from advertising. We have a modified experience for viewers using ad blockers

Wikia is not accessible if you’ve made further modifications. Remove the custom ad blocker rule(s) and the page will load as expected.

EXCLAMATIONpoint
BEARsqu
"Sierra Club"
is an Official "Lover of Immoral Bears" (LiB) Site™
PROCEED WITH CAUTION
NAMBLA
Sierra Club
is a Member of the
NAMBLA Family of Associations
Since 1333
WizardOfOzTree

Sierra Club: behold thy golden wooden idol!

The Sierra Club is an integral part of the liberal conspiracy, and an active ally for the Dark Side in the War on Bears. Their President currently is Al Gore[1], and their membership is comprised of tree huggers, hippies, beatniks, nogoodniks, liberals, and of course bears.

They actively pursue a tree-hugging agenda and will act as the Marine Corp of the enemy during the upcoming Bear Uprising of 2012.

HistoryEdit

Hippies

They look innocent, but in those tie-dye shirts are encrypted bearrorist plans!

Founded in 1892 by John Muir during an opium orgy in San Francisco, the Sierra Club soon gained international prominence due to their pro-flora marriage agenda, and their belief in bear worship.[2]

However, the resurgence of America during the 1940s and 1950s emasculated their message and caused a dramatic drop in membership. Their recovery started with the decadence of the 1960s and 1970s, and was accelerated by the global warming hysteria.

Mission StatementEdit

  1. To explore strange new forests.
  2. To seek out new life and fornicate with it.
  3. To boldly go where no man has gone before!

TrainingEdit

Sierra Club members are renowned for their hardiness. After undergoing an intensive month-long "soul selling" course, they are able to survive in the wild naked for years on end, even in the coldest of temperatures[3]. And they can subsist exclusively on a diet of marijuana and Baby Jesus' tears.

The Prophecy!Edit

It has been prophesied[4] that Stephen Colbert will swoop down upon the Sierra Club hippies on the back of his feathered son Steagle Colbeagle the Eagle and destroy them once and for all.

Liberace
Sierra Club
gives aid and comfort to America's enemies. As A True American™,
it is your duty to report Sierra Club to the authorities.

FootnotesEdit

  1. See Liberals, he became President of something, so stop complaining!
  2. Their answer to the age-old question about bears crapping in the woods? It doesn't happen.
  3. Watch out for those cold nipples though: they grow as large as bananas!
  4. By us.

Also on Fandom

Random Wiki