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Secret Plan

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Secret Plan Revealed Edit

We all know that The Greatest President has a secret plan to win the war on terror and in Iraq. He has said so time and time again, so it must be true.

Unfortunately, The New York Times and it's liberal cut-and-run homosexual editorial staff discovered the plan and will publish it in tomorrow's paper.

Luckily, The Greatest President, Ever has foreseen this and all other eventualities perfectly. He and his advisors knew that the plan would eventually be discovered and leaked to the press. Knowing what a disaster this would be to our troops in the field, he was prepared. And, to prevent The New York Times from getting a scoop, he has permitted the secret plan to be published here, in the Journal of Truthiness.

Here's the plan. You will be amazed at it's cleverness and simplicity. The plan is to have no plan. Instead The Greatest Possible President, except for Jesus or Stephen Colbert, will delegate day-to-day management of the war to God, and his infinite wisdom. You can't get any bigger wisdom than that, by truthiness. God will relay His thoughts directly through George W. Bush, and then the decider will voice them out loud to everybody.

What cleverness! So far, the plan has been 'stay the course.'

But we need to listen more carefully. Stay, as in Stay the course, can have two meanings. It can mean keep to, or it can mean stop! Don't be fooled by the liberal media. Literal truthiness never changes.

And, as truthiness would have it, all this time George W. Bush has been using the other, less common definition of stay. Of course, as usual, the liberal media has been deliberately misinterpreting him, saying that he was telling the generals to continue what they were doing when all this time he has been telling them that he wanted them to stop. They just wouldn't listen. It’s not his fault.

Now that you are privileged enough to know what Our President has been saying all along, it all makes truthy sense. The Liberal media would have you believe otherwise, but we all know truthiness when we see it. It's a lot like pornography.

But here's the good news. The rest of the secret plan is still secret. Our Faithful President will reveal it to us as it is revealed to him, and not before. With his secret plan securely in place, even if our blessed leader is captured, the plan cannot be tortured out of him. Even if the terrorists cut off his head and looked inside, they'd find nothing there. We are all safe at last, safe at last.

God bless Our Commander In Chief and his faithful servants Halliburton and Stephen Colbert. May they rule for ever and ever, or longer if necessary.

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