River City, Iowa, U.S. of A: Otherwise known as "The Heartland," One of Stephen Colbert's many psuedo home towns. A Place where they still set up a manger on Christmas so The Baby Jesus has a place to rest his weary head while he helps Santa Claus deliver all those presents to good boys and girls.
- Home to Marian, the Librarian. The original Republican Goddess.
- Where they still pray in school.
- Where all young men and women still say Ma'am and Sir.
- Where they still button their knickerbockers below the knee.
- Last whistle stop on the way to the Twilight Zone.
Stephen has heard through the grapevine that there is trouble... yes... yes... yes... TROUBLE, right here in River City. And that starts with a "T" and that rhymes with "P" and that stands for "POOL."
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This article is not a stub. It is a perfect and complete source of Truthiness that cannot be improved upon. If it ain't broke don't f#@k with it. You will get a Wag of the Finger* from Stephen if you .
*Wag of the Finger not guaranteed.