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Red Hair

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Reagan tiny
Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall!
Red Hair
and Ginger
should be merged to make my ghost happy!

There are some benefits of having red hair. There are also some downsides. There are also some controversies.

Vampire skull 733-009

the skull of a redhead

Downsides to Red Hair Edit

  • All people with red hair are untrustworthy.
  • Men with red hair are usually crazy geeks who can't grow small beards (they usually come in all crazy and bushy)
  • Women with red hair are usually crazy, like the men's beards.

Research has shown that all redheads used to be genetically homogeneous with vampires and still posses the same large canine teeth, and sensitivity to sun as they "sun burn", the so called sun burns are accully a preexisting medical condition in which the skin attepmts to join the hair in redness. However their hunger for blood has been supressed as a result of natural selection, and the evolutionary pressures blood suckers had in the American gene pool.

Benefits to Red Hair Edit

Megan-atheist-small

A red head devil.

  • Easy to pick out in a crowd.
  • People with red hair are automatically assumed to be interesting because of their inherent crazy genes.
  • Women with red hair are crazy alright...and that includes in the bedroom.

ControversyEdit

Some people think having red hair is exciting. Sometimes people will dye their hair to make it red. There is only one way to make sure the red hair is real, and not dyed: the carpet must match the drapes. As an American, you have the right to check; it's in The United States Constitution.

Liberals Behind Red HairEdit

Red hair is caused by two recessive genes. Red Hair has been scientifically proven to be a liberal gene (see Elizabeth Kucinich). As such, Stephen Colbert will have nothing to do with anyone sporting a fiery hairdo.

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