How can you tell if you're a Red-Blooded American?
Here are some identifying characteristics, courtesy of Glenn Beck:
- Feels suspicious of American Muslims, especially democratically elected ones.
- Buys Christmas presents at ColbertNation.com
- Has never attended a same-sex marriage.
- Has never burned an American flag.
- Doesn't listen to The Dixie Chicks.
If you fit this description, and you live in the United States of America, not plain old America, you're a Red-Blooded American.
If you don't fit this description, you are invited to a reservation in Taxachusetts.
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