Primal Gut

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Artistic interpretation of the Primal Gut, not the actual thing.

The Primal Gut: reservoir of Infinity. The PG invented All the Gods, the One True Christian God of America and America itself. The PG however did not Invent George Bush or Stephen Colbert; the One True Christian God invented George Bush and Stephen Colbert Invented the Primal Gut. So we know he is an important dude.

The PG is the root of all of mankind’s Truthiness and is all Goodness. The PG keeps things from going stale, it keeps our life VITAL with it’s perpetual Truthitations.

The Primal Gut exists somewhere out there between dimensions ethereally tethered to our personal guts and keeps us informed of the Kosmic Truthiness we are sadly unable to access with mortal minds. Today, however, there is growing hostility towards the PG from Fact mongers who wish us all to perish in the uniformity of Entropy. Because Fact comes from energy and matter it will eventually wear out, but because Truthiness is theoretical in nature it will never wear out and never deplete. These enemies are mostly Atheists, Liberals, Actors and the Devil, collectively known as the Liberal Intelligence Elite, who try to confuse us with Fact. The One True Christian God Knows the only way to penetrate the Primal Gut (Heaven) is to owe allegiance to His Kid and His Groupies. This is NOT to be questioned on orders from George Bush.

Fact as Illusion – The Primal Gut as TruthEdit

The Primal Gut
Proof: Stephen Colbert Invented It
Function: To emboldened you with Truthiness.
Tactics: Blinding Gut feelings
Enemies: Baby Muhammad
Outcome: A World-wide Gut awareness

Because Fact will eventually disintegrate from existence leaving only the Primal Gut and Truthiness, we can safely call Fact a transient substance and therefore inconsequential. Whatever laughs last, laughs hardest and the Primal Gut will be laughing forever just like it was laughing before Fact existed. Hence the term, “Belly Laugh” which denotes extreme jolliness. In fact*, the Primal Gut invented energy and matter like a veritable Adam and Eve when it was bored one day.

*yuk yuk yuk

Your Relationship with the Primal GutEdit

…Should be self-explanatory; embrace Truthiness with all your Gut. Even those traitors the scientists got their ideas from their Gut before trying to “Verify” it with Fact. Therefore the Meaning of Life is simple, (after serving God and America,) INVENT a purpose for your Life. Do not view this as a challenge; listening to your Gut should be the easiest thing in the world. Those damn Fact seekers and Atheists keep us confused about what’s Really Important: SUBJECTIVE PERSONAL EXPERIENCES!! Which are far better guides for Truth than a million books. Wikiality is NOT an online encyclopedia; it is an infinite number of monkeys typing on an infinite number of keyboards for infinity. Truthiness prevails.


The Battle Rages on Edit

The Primal Gut produces a quality: CONSCIOUSNESS! Therefore, Human Life is the Primal Gut sensing itself and through this constant process, meaning is created. We know this is obvious because Truthiness manifests as a by-product and Truthiness is Good! Truthiness is something we can understand because we feel it in our Gut. And thus the cycle is completed. The Satanic, Atheistic forces who wish undermine a purer connection with the Primal Gut are trying to prevent us from reaching immortality. You see, by relocating our personal consciousness inside the Primal Gut we can strengthen the ethereal bond connecting the PG to US. The results would be dramatic! Access to Pure uncut Truthiness would literally transform our bodies. And our mind, while inside the Primal Gut would be able to interact with other minds inside the PG. The result here would be knowing exactly where to go, where to be and who to know. In short: UTOPIA!!

Heathen newagers have heathen newagey names for the Primal Gut, but Real Americans know it As the Holy Ghost for the One True Christian God. SAVE YOURSELF: TITHE 15% OF YOUR INCOME TO THE BABY JESUS, HE NEEDS A NEW CRIB AND BLANKEY! AAAAAAIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!

In conclusionEdit

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