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Plesiosaur

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Flammarion
Abandon Truthiness All Ye Who Enter This Internets Tube!
"Plesiosaur"
discusses one of the Liberal's Ridiculous Theories and Notions.
Plesiosaur

This is totally not a shark.

Plesiosaur are were giant lizard-like non-vegetable, non-mineral, non-sentient beings that may or may not have had feathers, scales or wore a saddle for jaunts around Biblical Atlantis.

Take That Darwin, Your Such a Lozer! LOLEdit

In 1977, while serving as Captain on board the fishing vessel Zuiyo-maru, Kent Hovind discovered the decomposing carcass of a Plesiosaur[1]. This was a triumphant find for the Creation-Science movement, since it unequivocally established that dinosaurs had died in the Biblical Flood, rather than being killed by a meteor, as postulated by Charles Darwin, or abducted by aliens, as theorized by T.H. Huxley.

Logic is Sucks, TooEdit

If a meteor had killed the dinosaurs as Charles Darwin suggested, then the plesiosaurs would have died out as well. If, as T.H. Huxley had suggested, the dinosaurs had been abducted by aliens for eugenics experiments, then the plesiosaur would have been abducted as well. But, because a plesiosaur was found in the oceans near Japan, the only viable alternative is that the Biblical account of the Genesis flood was true, and that (on account of Noah's human fallibility) many land based dinosaurs died while the plesiosaur lived on. This also means that the rocks of the late cretaceous period (dated to 65 million years ago by Darwinist geologists) couldn't be more than a few thousand years old.

You Mean-o, Lying AcidEdit

Captain Hovind sailed back to Pensacola at full steam with his triumphant find, fully expecting a Nobel Prize and widespread acclaim for his once-in-a-lifetime discovery. Unfortunately, secularist scientists performed comparisons of the carcass amino acid profile to the amino acid profile of a basking shark, and attempted to smear Hovind's find by using the fact that the two were identical. The comparison of amino acids is by no means conclusive however, since plesiosaurs and sharks both live in water, and we should expect them to have identical amino acid profiles. Furthermore, it may also be possible that the plesiosaur and basking shark are not actually distinct species, but that the plesiosaur is just a basking shark observed in a particular life stage.

War CrimeEdit

While it would be instructive to study the carcass further, the Secular Humanists at the Internal Revenue Service confiscated the remains during the arrest of Dr. Hovind, presumably to prevent further investigation in the name of creationism.

References Edit

  1. Kent Hovind, "Science or Religion?", Lecture, August 2005

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