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Abandon Truthiness All Ye Who Enter This Internets Tube!
discusses one of the Liberal's Ridiculous Theories and Notions.

Not the type of pirate you were hoping to find? Well, then, you probably ought to look here.
Story Book 09050 Sexy Pirate

Yo! Ho!

Pirates (PIE-rat) are a race of mythological aquatic humanoids created by Liberals and Communists to support their hair-brained theories of global warming and evolution and to celebrate their hatred of Our Lord and Savior.

Fascist propaganda tells stories about pirates celebrating larceny, alcoholism, and poor speech habits, all known properties of Liberals (created in their own image, one would say).

Pirates Have Their Own Special Day!Edit

Who Chooses To Become A Pirate And WhyEdit



Where One Can Find A PirateEdit



How To Spot A PirateEdit


ass pirates prep to swab each others poop decks

Some recognizable traits of Pirates include:

  • cybernetic augmented arms and legs
  • eye patches
  • pet birds
  • jet packs
  • excessive use of the word "poop-deck"
  • Anyone who uses Limewire
  • Somali pirates are known to smell of poop[1]

Famous PiratesEdit


Get this gay crap off me!

  • Black Beard, a famous fearsome pirate
  • Captain Hook, a famous pedo-pirate
  • Sean Fanning, a famous music pirate
  • Robert Reed, a famous heiny pirate
  • Ted Haggard, a famous reverend/butt pirate
  • Captain Jack Swallow, the most famous butt pirate

What Pirates Do During Working HoursEdit


Spending 4 months at sea with a boatload of homos will do things to you.

What Pirates Do in Their Spare TimeEdit



Famous Series of Tubes PiratesEdit

Hoist The Colours01:32

Hoist The Colours

A Call for War:
The Internet Pirates are coming

See Also Edit

External TubesEdit

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