Paul Dinello is Stephen Colbert's heterosexual life partner. Paul and Stephen met each other at Second City. The first time they laid eyes on each other, they engaged in heated heterosexual man-loving. But let it be known, neither man is gay (this makes Baby Jesus sad).
During an interview with Newsweek, Colbert had this to say about his relationship with Dinello: "I resent accusations that we are gay lovers. Paul and I are best friends, and we are both openly Amerisexual."
It has been confirmed by Dinello's friends that he does indeed identify himself as an Amerisexual. In the past he has dated Amy Sedaris and (it has been rumored) Princess Diana, but his longest, and most committed relationship is with America herself (identified as feminine, so he's not a queer).
*may cause cold sores. (It's not a cold sore...)
Michelangelo himself sculpted them, having perfected the technique with his David. They are perfect for doing laundry and cracking open beers.
he is a big fan of the Jonas Brothers