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Parental Rights are the rights that every American who has children has, which aren't currently in the Constitution, but soon will be.

Since the dark days of Terri Schiavo, parents everywhere have been under threat. Now, thanks to Republican lawmakers Pete Hoekstra and Jim DeMint, fertile Americans everywhere will be protected from the communistasization of the American family.


Back in 1989, the UN created a secret charter to legalize gayness at the expense of the American Family™.

Notes, Notes2

Enemies Of American Familial SovereigntyEdit

The Threat From The UNEdit

The Threat From Hillary ClintonEdit

The Threat From Teh GheysEdit

Socialism & Communism Is Probably Involved, TooEdit

How Americans Can Recognize The Importance Of ParentsEdit

Really, the only way for Real Americans to show any form of respect for their parents is to amend the Constitution to strictly adhere to The Bible, especially the fifth commandment, which commands:

LeftCherubLeftCherubHonor Thy Father and Thy Mother, but mostly your father.RightCherubRightCherub
~ The Holy Bible, Fifth Commandment, God's true and Holy Word

LeftCherubLeftCherubSpare not the rod, for the Lord thy God gave you this Earth and dominion over all its creatures including your crotch-fruit. And lo, do not make Him come down and give you a reason to cry.RightCherubRightCherub
~ The Holy Bible, Yeah, So He Spake To Thou Once Before 1:2

LeftCherubLeftCherubThe Lord created the Heavens and the Earth in six days. He created light and water and America's Planet! And He gave unto Adam and Eve all His creations. Lo, he did not create Adam and Steve. Nor did He give them anything--not water or light or the right to sully the institution of marriage! Amen.RightCherubRightCherub
~ The Holy Bible, God's Loving & Tolerant Word

Text Of The Proposed BillEdit

The American Constitutional Recognition of the Rights Of Parents

We, the parents of the next generation of American soldiers, in order to form a more perfect nation, establish Christian Biblical Law, insure domestic authority, provide for military dominance, promote unfettered free markets and bless the security from terrorism for ourselves, do ordain and establish this one-time, reasonable, loophole-free amendment to the Constitution of the United States of America.

Suggested Punishment For Breaking The LawEdit

  • Lawmakers insist that this law should be retro-active.

See AlsoEdit

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