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|The "Great" State of OKLAHOMA |
|State Flower:||Bamboo Tree|
|State Bird:||The Dirty Bird|
|State Motto:||"You can't fry bacon here."|
|Nickname:||"The gun that Texas is threatening to kill New Mexico with."|
|Governor:||Tom Cruise from that one movie|
|State Anthem:||"We took our land from Indians"|
|Population:||Count it on one hand|
|Standard MPH:||As fast as your horse can go|
|Principal exports:||Dust (ask your grandparents)|
|Principal industries:||Tornado Production|
|Fun Fact # 1:||Gas is 6 cents a gallon because no one owns a car|
|Fun Fact # 2:||Barry Sanders is the greatest thing ever to happen to Oklahoma. Period.|
Most Americans have not yet discovered Oklahoma. 77% of third-graders label it Iowa on school quizzes
Lots of running, shooting, more running, BLACK GOLD, some more shooting, craploads of dust and mass exodus to Cali-for-ni-ay!
Musicals, country music (you remember the "boot in yer ass" song? Okie born and bred.).
Don't like the weather? Wait a while, it'll change. - Will Rogers
We've got droughts, flooding, wind, ice, snow. We've had snow in July (think I'm kidding, go check it out), and 90 degrees PLUS in October and November. We have 4 distinguishable seasons: Tornado, Ice, Flood, and Desert. Though in no particular order, one (possibly all) of these will happen in any given 24 hour period.
It's our Centennial, so wish us Happy Birthday, and congratulations on somehow being worthy enough to be kept in God's majestic creation that is The United States of Colbe.... I mean.. America!
We officially support Stephen Colbert's campaign for Presidency.
Oklahoma was founded in 1943 by Rodgers and Hammerstein and is the only state based upon a show tune.
A statute was passed that, in the State of Oklahoma, when you turn the age of 100 you officially become a woman. The statute was proposed, seconded and voted on by Mike Gundy.
- Giant Blue Whale
- Statue of on oilman without his shirt on
- Boone Pickens Stadium home of the annual November 31st Dust Bowl
- Colbert, OK
- Kind of looks like a mail box flag thats pointing down.
- Hanson- That young boy threesome who fought with the Spice Girls for record supremacy in the mid 90's.
- Mickey Mantle- New York Yankee baseball player. Better than Babe Ruth because Mickey voted Republican.
- Pretty Boy Floyd- Notorious Gangster who wasn't actually that pretty. Or a boy, so guess he was really just Floyd.
A Typical Day in OklahomaEdit
- 5:00- A.M. Wake up and tend your cattle.
- 6:30- Kill your breakfast and eat it.
- 7:00- Fire up your diesel truck, run to town for the days supply of beer.
- 8:00-1:30 Drink beer and goof off.
- 1:30- P.M. Catch a fish and eat it for lunch.
- 2:00-5:30 Take a nap.
- 6:00- Pick up your buddies in your 4x4 and go mud bogging.
- 8:00- P.M. - 3:00 A.M. Go to your local hot spot, go noodling, then catch a 100 lb spoonbill catfish.
- 3:00-5:00 Sleep.
I live in Oklahoma. This is actually what I do.
- Charitable Organizations in Oklahoma
- Oklahoma: America's last outpost of Morality and Christianity
- Oklahoma's first rate edjucashunal system
- New Oklahoma Abortion Law passed to shame whores
- Oklahoma invaded by Gay Nazis
- Oklahoma finally find solution to the Injun problem
- Oklahoma outlaws fetus meat. No more baby eating, liberals