Nicholas Cage

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Nicholas Cage
is a CELEBRITY! Oh. My. God.
Cage hair

The Many Toupees Real Hair Styles of Nicholas Cage
Hollywood's #2 raging heterosexual is also a member of The Hair Club for Men.

Boss Edit

Nicolas Cage is a real boss

Nicholas Cage is actually the alter ego of Kal-El, last survivor of the planet Krypton (until the birth of his son Kal-El II in 2005). Made a name for himself by winning three straight Oscars in the movies Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow, Nacho Libre and Saw 3... not because he is related to anyone famous. He seems to play the same characters in all of his films as part of a brilliant disguise to hide his true identity from the public. You can see Nicholas Cage is his upcoming movie adaptian of Dr. Suess's Hop on Pop.

In the netherlands there is a curch called "the church of the Cage" here the viccard tells stories from the Nicholas Cage Bible. The bible is about the birth and crucefixion of the great lord cage, and his ressurection.

There is a new phone called the N-Cage. When you use this phone, you pay 10 cents for every minute directly to Nicholas Cage.

Nicholas Cage died today by falling off the balcony of a 20 story building.

In the Church of Cage there are 10 commandments,

 1 The Cage giveth, and the Cage taketh away
 2 Thou shall not speak blasphomy abouth the Lord of War
 3 Cage is god
 4 Thou shall watch Cage movies 
 5 Thou shall not make fun of Cage his wife
 6 Thou shall buy Cage his Angel Kings
 7 Thou shall respect Cage his acting
 8 MM
 9 Nicolas Cage is boss
 10 The good, the bad, and the Nicolas Cage

Niholas CageEdit

Nicolas Cage is love, Nicolas Cage is life

Accusations That He Sucks As An Actor And Gets Work Due To His RelativesEdit

  • "Lord of War" is a documentary, and not a movie. People were just filming the pure , gayness awesomeness of Nicolas Cage and edited the footage down to show his love of phallic symbols.

Possible $cientologyEdit

What The Fuck Is With His Hair?Edit


The Fashion Forward Cage
Always on the cutting edge of toupee hair styles, Nick Cage models his look for the upcoming remake of "The Birdman Of Alcatraz."

Yuri Orlov Edit

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