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New Mexico

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U R Here
JesusRebel
New Mexico
is a Recognized State of the United States of America.
All the geography American schoolkids Need To Know.

See Also:

New Mexico
NEWMEXICO
Capitol: New Mexico Cit
State Flower: Roadside Memorials
Official Language: Spanglish
State Bird: Roadrunner
State Motto: We Don't Need No Stinkin' Badges!
Nickname: The Land of Entrapment (come on vacation, leave on probation)
Governor: Doesn't Matter
State Anthem: "La Cucaracha"
Population: Does that count Native Americans too?
Standard MPH: However fast your car can go while downing a tall can
Principal imports: Illegals from over the border
Principal exports: Orange Construction Barrels
Principal industries: Adobe Bricks
Fun Fact # 1: Ted Turner bought his shares of New Mexico for $4 each
Fun Fact # 2: The average rainfall in New Mexico is greater than the rainforest

There is a tendency to believe that Texas is neighboring Arizona, and Colorado’s south border leads directly to Mexico. However, there is a 121,590ish square mile chunk of land known as New Mexico in that location.


Statistics Edit

The 47th state to enter the union, New Mexico has worked extremely hard to keep that ranking throughout the network of rankable statistics. Unfortunately, New Mexico has come in 46th place for “Being able to keep a consistent ranking” and is working overtime to remedy this travesty. There is speculation that being the 48th smartest state evens out this statistic, in which case all is good with the world


Nickname: The Land of Enchantment Edit

The Land of Enchantment earns this nickname by being a place that possesses some of the most enchanting and desirable qualities for a living community. For example, the number of lightning strike deaths per capita is rather high, as is the number of Hantavirus Pulmonary Syndrome outbreaks, DWI deaths per capita, and alien abduction cover-ups.


Wildlife Edit

New Mexico is home to many species of wildlife. The Mexican Wolf, The Brazilian Free Tailed Bat, The Arizona Shrew, The Colorado Chipmunk, The New Mexico State Aggie, and William H. Bonney are prime examples. Although many of these species appear to be from different areas, New Mexico’s wildlife would not be the same without them.

The Jacqueline rabbit and the Jerome chupacabra are among the deadliest venomous critters in the state. Local officials have tried for years to control the pandemic death from these particular native creatures. The CDC has determined that these phenomeonal creatures came from the rainforest located in the heart of New Mexico. Also the Espanola low-walking monkey is another deadly species.

Noteworthy stuff Edit

  • New Mexico is one of the first states to receive disaster funding for drought and flooding simultaneously.
  • Liberal scumbag Ted Turner reportedly owns 5% of New Mexico, which pales in comparison to his 40% ownership of Old Mexico. Turner raises massive thundering herds of murderous buffalo on his ranches.
  • It is rumored that New Mexico was listed as one of the best places for careers and business in 2006. A great accomplishment for the state…a mere 30 years after denying a business license to Bill Gates.

External LinksEdit

Charitable Organizations in New Mexico

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