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The Nerd Patrol is a group of people that tend to cough out lots of half-digested, cheese flavored corn chips though their nose if a fact isn't stated exactly as it is written in the Nerd's worm infested textbook. They are smarter than the Geek Squad and they are seeking to destroy America by forcing Americans to be exposed to facts.
- Stephen Colbert mentioned them on the August 22 episode of The Colbert Report in regard to mathematics.
- Braniac is the nerd patrol's Superman.