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"On Lerna's murderous hound, the many-headed hydra, he set his branding-iron, and smeared its venom on his darts..."
NAMBLA is probably the largest of all brotherhoods, encompassing as it does the National Basketball Association, the American Federation of State, County and Municipal Employees, the American Association of Retarded People, the Kyoto Protocols on Climate Change, the Motion Picture Academy of Arts and Science, the US Senate Commerce and Transportation Committee, the Organization of Petroleum Exporting Countries, News Activism Means Better Living for All, the Democratic Party, and many more. In recent years, the "great umbrella" of NAMBLA has become so far-reaching in its scope that very few Americans are aware that they are already members, several times over.
NAMBLA was founded in 325 A.D. when Constantine took over the Catholic Church. He soon gathered large numbers of young boys into his chambers for the first NAMBLA congress. Such has been the trend ever since, NAMBLA members holding congress with young boys. Some well know and highly regarded past Presidents of NAMBLA include TV host Ed Sullivan, Cuban Fidel Castro, TV personality "Mr. Rogers",Music personality "Vanilla Ice" and Talk Show blabber mouth Rush Limbaugh. Through the years many women have sought membership and been denied such as Hillary Clinton and Bubbles McKenzie from Cinncinati.
The North America Marlon Brando Lookalike Association fights with NAMBLA, the North American Man-Boy Love Association, relentlessly for the rights to the nambla.com domain. It is a hostile feud if there ever was one and much blood has been shed.
- Michael Moore President
- Al Franken Vice-President
- Mark Foley Spokesperson
- Tree Huggers
- Black people
- North American Man-Bear Love Association
- NAMBLA's new rewards program
- Jerry Sandusky, the longest honorary member of NAMBLA, to retire
- Touched: The Jerry Sandusky Story (NAMBLA gives this book no stars. There is no mention about touching children!)