The money a man borrows from the bank is called a "loan". When he wants to buy a house, this Real American has to go to a bank to cover for the full cost and pay interest to keep the economy afloat. This special kind of loan is called a mortgage loan.
Loans for Real AmericansEdit
|"A growing family with a lot of debt, a young couple with no down payment a business owner who's income was hard to document. Every one of them was turned down by 3 different lenders. I'm with Countrywide, and I got them all approved." |
A Real American will have a credit score of 660 or better and will always have a down payment of 20% or more, never less like people who get sub-prime loans.
Loans for Lesser AmericansEdit
An American who doesn't have a job (or steady income from a legitimate job) will qualify immediately for a sub-prime loan from any loan institution.
Other prerequisites Lesser Americans should have to qualify are:
- spinning rims on the wheels of the car they are behind payments on
- too many children to count (including the one(s) ready to pop any minute)
- enough ring tones so that all of his phones have unique rings for all his peeps.
Other Loans Which May Soon Become ProblematicEdit
- Student Loans
- Obama's new student loans
- New Student Loan bankrupts Nation
- Communist laws bankrupts banks
- Hippie bears destroys economy!
- Commie Government wants your money!
- Profits are returning!
- Communist government to stop America's way of making money
- Communist government to stop America's dream of money
- How The Bush Administration Made Us All Wealthy!
- Help! Communist Government undermining the free market!
- communists are stealing bank's money!
- communist government hates the free market
- Another Welfare Queen refuses to pay up
- Dangerous communists fired for attacking people that made money
- Welfare Queen refuses to pay loan
- Dont worry. Mortgagemodificationloannotascam.com can help you out!
- Welfare Queens failed to clean up their mess