The "Mile High Club" is an elite association made up entirely of those who have copulated in an airborne aircraft. Invented by Orville Wright, Kitty Hawk, SC, circa 1904
- Also known as "Going/Gone to Heaven."
- Non-qualifying acts:
- Gay sex: Homos will do it anywhere, they don't count.
- Oral Sex: Is Abstinence Education approved, so it is pure, thus isn't sex.
- Masturbation: That's just pathetic.
- Beastiality: Sexing fat flight attendants is a Sin.
- Voyuerism: Watching is not doing.
Mile High Club LevelsEdit
- Charter Member: One qualifying act.
- Bronze Member: Two-five acts.
- Gold Member: five-10 acts.
- Platinum: 10 or more or one of the following acts:
- Airborne bagging of a Slutty Flight Attendant.
- A threesome.
- Doing it in the Cockpit.
- Doing in your seat while other passengers watch.
- Admiralty: Over 50 qualifying acts and at least two acts from either Platinum or Elite levels.
- Ace (AKA Maverick): Doing it while making a hypersonic low level flyover.
- Stephen Colbert (Admiralty)
- Esteban Colberto (Platinum)
- Charles Lindberg (Elite)
- Maverick (Ace)
- Ralph Fiennes (Platinum)
- James Bond (Admiralty)
- Cher (Admiralty)
Fun Mile High Stories, BE BRIEF AND TRUTHY!Edit
- On honeymoon, flight delayed, couldn't wait to get airborne. Went into lavatory w/wife, got very busy. Removed from lavatory and escorted off plane by TSA and LAX Police, detained and questioned by FBI for three hours then released. --PhantomDuck 10:46, 17 June 2009 (UTC)