|Full Network Name||The MTV|
|Availability||America, Canada, Mexico|
The MTV Networks (Viacom)
|Types of Programs||Everything but music videos|
|Sister Networks|| VH1|
|Most Popular Programs|| Total Request Live|
The Pre-Taped Real World
|Most Popular Celebrities|| Martha Quinn|
The MTV is a cable television music video channel that doesn't play music videos. It's also known amongst smart people (aka Heroes) as Moron Television.
Launched in the 1980's with the purpose of warping the minds and morals of America's youth through constant repetition of sexually-charged Madonna and Duran Duran music videos, it later changed tactics and now warps the minds and morals of America's youth through constant repetition of sexually-charged shows like Road Rules, The Real World: Yet Another City, My Sweet 16 (who gives a shit about spoiled-ass brats) and the shockingly titled Pimp My Ride!
The MTV's mission is to transform our Nation's angelic children into pimps and hos, where all that matters is the Benjamins and knocking boots.
- The first music video played on The MTV was Stephen and the Colberts' Charlene (I'm Right Behind You). Everything else they've aired since then has been total and utter retarded bullshit.
- The MTV seduced many youthful Americans by using musical geniuses like Sting in their early ad campaign "I want my The MTV!"
- Early The MTV VJ Martha Quinn is a hell-sent succubus.
- According to Dr. Colbert, MTV airs crap programming for slow teens
- The MTV is also referred to as MTZ by a certain segment of talking goats.
- MTV became gay after they premiered The "maN tOuch"