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is something Middle-eastern,
which may or may not be very explosive.

Great place to go skiing.

Pay close attention to the trail guides; they have guns.

It helps to be a Muslim when you're there, but not a Sunni Muslim. You should be a Shiite Muslim, or is it Kurd (are they even Muslims? I don't know; is there a difference?)

Pay close attention to the color of your clothe since the the popular colors have been confiscated by the various political parties (i.e. Yellow, Blue, Orange, Pistachio and the rainbow). If you don't want to be mistaken for a Sunni don't wear blue. It is best to go with Yellow, Hezbollah, if you plan to stay in the Muslim section of the country. In the Christian section, neutral colors are recommended.

Avoid any hand gestures as they might be interpreted as an endorsement to a specific political party. Yes, those have been confiscated as well!

Avoiding politics in Lebanon might be the best advice to give to any tourist heading that way, just ask Christopher Hitchens! (on 2/14/09, he got his ass kicked by pro-Syrian thugs in Beirut)

You can watch the Colbert Report at 1am on the Showtime Comedy channel.

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