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Al Franken
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Kool-Aid is a chemical compound created as part of a communist plot to brainwash our children to become bear-loving liberals.

Chemical Composition Edit

Since chemistry is completly untruthiness and therefore inherently wrong, few scientists are able to accurately define the composition of this "Kool-Aid". The most credible theory, stated by truthy Warrior Pat Robertson, says that Kool-Aid is actually comprised of 2 parts water, 1 part poison, and 7 parts bear hormones (obviously to make our children more attractive to bears, therefore promoting bear/boy love).

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Kool-Aid Man Edit

Kool-Aid is also responsible for that bastard punch bowl that breaks down every hard working American's walls just to give their kids the brainwashing fluid (A.K.A. Kool-Aid) and then he just leaves. He doesnt help rebuild the disaster he just created. Therefore he is a bear and a communist!!! The catch phrase "Oh Yeah!", is the official mating screech of pro bear/boy love enthusiasts. In fact, the Kool-Aid man is completely composed of pure, un-republicanized evil. He must be stopped. In other news, the Kool-Aid man has recently been witnessed invading lunchrooms across the nation in a renewed attempt to spread his multi-colored bear juice on the children of the nation, which will then attract bears, and cause a relentless round of mass sexual domnination via the practice of bear/boy love. It IS all the Kool-Aid man's fault. The recession, sea gulls, the democrats, the liberal extremists, the communists, the pencils with broken lead before you sharpen them, kool-Aid rape children and eats balls of little ones and once you have  ingested kool-aid you will vomit for 400 days and 400 nights

Effects on the Human Body Edit


9 out of 10 grandmas agree, Kool-Aid sucks!

The immediate effects of Kool-Aid on the human body are subtle, but they become more severe over time. Once ingested, the Kool-Aid runs through the body into the pituitary gland, which consequently starts to disentigrate, turning your insides irrevocably into a pile of gelatenous goo. The rate of gelatinous goo creation is increased rapidly at a rate equal to the consumption of the dangerous compound known as Kool-Aid. This causes symptoms that can vary anywhere from mild headaches to acute delusion, but the ultimate outcome is the complete loss of gutly instincts and/or your balls. Side effects also include spontaneous combustion and/or dysentary. Also, it may transform you into a bear-loving, democracy-eating Communist.

factoids Edit

  • Kool-Aid is the official drink of bears and other godless killing machines
  • Kool-Aid is directly responsible for the creation of crystal meth and Anthrax.
  • The three most popular flavours of Kool-Aid are cherry, orange, and terrorist.
  • Kool-Aid is responsible for Mark Foley being temporarily influenced by Satan (but he's sorry now).
  • The Kool-Aid plant is run by bears and Hitler in Cuba.
  • Kool-Aid Man is a liberal Commie creation and metaphorically breaks down the wall of conservatism to give welfare checks to kids.kool aids sucks oranges He must be stopped.
  • An entire town committed suicide one time, and they gave Kool-Aid with cyanide in it to kill their kids.
  • kool-aid is responsible for *NSYNC, the Backstreet Boys and Britney Spears.
  • Kool-aid is responsible for the phrases "Your Mom" and "That's What She Said".
  • Kool-aid is the product of man on dog on child.
  • Your mother in law drank kool-aid
  • Your grandmother was caught drinking kool-aid
  • Your prinicple is a pro bear/boy love enthusiast and drinks kool-aid
  • Your smallest siblings drink kool-aid
  • The chemical compounds of kool-aid, which fall into untruthiness, are designed to promote bear/boy love, and also the production of narwhal armies.
  • Narwhals drink kool-aid
  • Hitler created kool-aid by harvesting the blood of concentration camp inmates

See Also Edit

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