Despite what you may have heard
John Wayne Gacy, Jr.
Is totally not gay!
John Wayne Gacy, Jr.
makes The Baby Jesus sad.
Does your mother know you read these filthy liberal myths?

John Wayne Gacy, Jr. proving that people with the title of "Junior" affixed to their name can be as old, fat, and disheveled as any other American citizen.

John Wayne Gacy, Jr. was a serial killer of young boys and, worse, a Democrat. A Chicago Democrat, no less — who wants to bet me Jimmy Hoffa was buried under his house next to all those dead boys? And sure, factonistas will claim that Barack Hussein Obama was still in high school when Gacy committed his crimes — but how do we know they don't share the same agenda when they lived multiple times in the same state?

Unlike his namesake, Mr. Gacy was a little light in the loafers — the only thing he was ever light in, coincidentally. I mean, at least Ted Bundy hideously raped and murdered scores of women, and then got right with the Lord by voting Republican. That's a real serial killer for you, Mr. Gacy! A man's man!

Now, to be fair, Mr. Gacy did at least try to deny his sinful urges and re-channel his energy into the wholesome, all-American pursuits of binge-drinking, self-hating homophobia and serial murder. But then he went and voted Democrat, and it was just a matter of time before his new embrace of anything-goes moral relativism led him to kill scores of boys. If only he had accepted Reagan into his heart, this tragedy could have been avoided.

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