John Quincy Adams was the 6th President of the United States of America. He was also a nine-year-old boy genius during the Revolutionary War (he led an army of 6000 with George Washing), he co-signed the Declaration of Independence during the 4th of July (he came up with the idea of celebrating the day by drinking Samuel Adams' beer, eating delicious barbeque prepared by a slave, and watching football during the Patriots game, but no fireworks; I dont know who came up with that idea), and after all this he became a Founding Father during the Revolutionary War (not bad for a nine year old). He also ended slavery way before Lincoln did (that no-good-cheater-copying-bastard).
During his presidency, Qubya (as many called him) used his baldness to great effect, blinding political opponents and burning down barns filled with livestock corrupted by the spirit of Satan. He was eventually defeated in a rigged election by Democrat rival Andrew Jackson, but he made a triumphant return to the world of freedom after languishing in Congress as a representative from Taxachusetts/Gaysrael by representing a bunch of slaves in the watershed Amistad trial. He won over the Supreme Court and the slaves were returned to Africa, which is nowhere at all.