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|Profiles in Conservativism|
|George H. W. Bush|
John Ashcroft is a former Attorney General of the United States. He was appointed by the great(est) president, George W. Bush. Ashcroft waged a
crusade righteous war on Liberal (communist) concepts, such as getting high on marijuana, pornography, and freedom of speech. He was a big supporter of the PATRIOT Act. Ashcroft is a Conservative, therefore any person who questions him is a traitor.
According to his former Deputy Attorney General, James Comey, Mr. Ashcroft suffered a failure of judgment while recovering in intensive care after a brush with pancreatitis. Because of this, Ashcroft did not support the President in the way that the Attorney General should. Fortunately, Ashcroft soon recovered from this illness and supported the President again until he left the office in February 2005 to spend more time with his family.
John Ashcroft Freedom FractsEdit
- Is a Singer/Songwriter. He wrote and sang "Let the Eagle Soar". He also sang bass in The Singing Senators.
- Has Tea and Crumpets with Jesus everyday at high noon
- Defeated a dead man in a Senatorial Race, conceded race to become Attorney General
The Most Patriotic Attorney General Ever (eat it: Ramsey Clark)
- Was not as Patriotic as Alberto Gonzales, suffered a heart attack as a result
- doesn't have a gallbladder, just ask Alberto Gonzales and Andrew Card!