James Baker
is a Beautiful Republican
God Bless America
I am James Baker and my lawyer swears I'm not a
Colbert eagle sequence
James Baker
is a red-blooded American Hero!

God Bless These United States and The State of Florida Amen

James Baker III (born during the great depression) is the former Secretary of State, Treasury and Chief of Staff to American Hero and Former Greatest President Ever Ronald Reagan. James Baker is also the protector of democracy in Florida. James Baker has recently been seen as a hero protecting the Presidency of our Greatest President Ever, George W. Bush against the hellbound Liberals who want to criticize his judgment in invading Iraq. Also known as 'The Velvet Hammer,' James came up with a plan to deal with these liberal demons and one to ensure that freedom forever stays on the march in Iraq; the latter was not released until after the 2006 elections.

James Baker Freedom Factoids Edit

  • James is from the South, so you know he loves America more than anyone else
  • James makes The Baby Jesus smile for his Christian work. James is definitely going to heaven. Amen.
  • James was the Greatest Secretary of State, Ever! Sorry Condi and Colin
  • Stephen is a bigger fan of James Baker III than James Baker I and James Baker II combined.
  • James Baker and his wife Tammy Faye Baker hosted an evangelical television membership drive during the 1980's.

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