Hal Turner

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Hal Turner
is a Truthiness Crusader!
Despite what you may have heard
Hal Turner
Is totally not racist!
Despite what you may have heard
Hal Turner
Is totally not gay!

Hal Turner is a great American radio host and commentator who speaks for one of society's most oppressed, underserved groups: paranoid racists. (He is of course not racist himself, but you gotta play to the audience.) When he's not providing helpful hints on staying stylish after the Rapture or preparing for the impending race war on a budget, Hal is decorating his North Bergen home or trolling surfing Hannidate looking for men to join in Bible study (if that's what the kids are calling it nowadays).

Hal is a close friend friend distant acquaintance of Sean Hannity's, and frequently might have once called in to his radio show. He also worked for volunteered for might have once walked by Pat Buchanan's campaign headquarters, but who remembers?

Hal is also influential in legal circles, and recently exercised his Constitutional right to free speech by telling his online friends where they could meet and greet with a few judges.

Hey Ma!
Pack your banjo and chewin' t'backer, we fixin' to enjoy us some
Hal Turner

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