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The hacky sack, or "foot scrotum", is a religious item used by hippies, and therefore should be avoided by real Americans. It was invented in a drug-induced haze by two hippies in Oregon before Ronald Reagan was president (also known as the Dark Ages).
The objective of hacky sack is to get hack. It is necessary to play the game while high because otherwise it is really boring (like during chruch). It also helps to be STONDED OFF YOUR ASS
Because the people who play hacky sack can't remember the last five minutes, the history of the game is rather irrelevant. However, it is important to note that the first "foot scrotums" were actually a single moose testicle (having been removed from the moose). The cheerful yarn covering was later added because kicking around a bare moose testicle was, "A complete drag, man."so if you dont hack you arent high. And if your not high, your not a hippie. Therefore you cant hacky sack.
Having conducted an interview while researching this entry, I will simply quote one John "PeaceDude" Fairchild: "Rules are for the MAN! Hacky sack is about cooporation and good times. Rules kill our inner butterfly..." At this point, PeaceDude offered me a hit and commented on how pretty the leaves were.
I'm a little hazy on what happened with the rest of my research that day. Suffice it to say that Mr. Fairchild had some serious chronic.
The Hacky-sack Edit
Not to be confused with the Hacky sack the Hacky-sack is an all American phenomenon. Dr. Colbert has mad skills with the Hacky-sack and is the only one to have "sacked" around in the National Portrait Gallery.Episode #337