Glass-Steagall Act

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Glass-Steagall Act
is part of's series on Socialistic, America-hating Ideas!

The Glass-Steagall Act was a liberal socialist policy that said that commercial banks shouldn't mingle with investment banks, insurance industries, security industries, or have Real Estate partners. There is nothing wrong with having multiple financial partners as long as you have "regulations" to protect America's economy from thieves, liars, and crooks FREEDOM!!!! It was such an old fashioned policy that it needed to be "modernized" with an ultra cool 21st century Act. Many corporate executives Real Americans agree that the Act was both antiquated and cumbersome for the banking industry, in that it suppressed financial creativity and stifled financial success for Entrepreneurial Americans who wanted to legally steal produce financial success.

Congress Wants a Cool, Sexy, and Younger Financial deRegulationEdit

The Glass-Steagall Act prohibited the Ultra Rich from making too much money, which means it denies prosperity to all All Americans. If the Ultra Rich made lots of money, the little people rest of us would be rich too thanks to "Trickle-down Economics". But the socialist liberals hated this idea and made it illegal for anyone to make "too much money". So a coalition of banks, insurance companies, real estate corporations, and other entrepreneurial Americans joined forces to "modernize" America's financial system to be replaced with a more "hip" system.

One such Real American Hero was Ultra Rich Senator Dr. Phil Gramm, the same guy who is was John McCain's economic adviser! Gramm spearheaded these new capitalistic ideas and was responsible for repealing the outmoded act to be replaced with the more pro-capitalist act:

“You’ve heard of freedom repression; this is a capitalist repression. We have sort of become a nation of whiners, you just hear this constant whining, complaining about loss of "regulations", America in jeopardy of creating a global financial crisis… nonsense. Mr. Clinton tear down this "regulatory" wall!”

The Senators liked the new and cool sexy act that it was passed unanimously by a large majority. The old act was repealed by pro-business and pro-capitalist politicians who wanted to bring more wealth to America, and there is no way that they personally benefited from this. The Senate then introduced the more Capitalist Friendly act that brought great prosperity and profits to The Ultra Rich Real Americans for all time!... until the financial crisis of 2008.


Save The CEO, Save The World

Al Franken
Glass-Steagall Act has earned

Emergency Update!Edit

Surprise, surprise, Comrade Obama wants to institute communist "Debt Panels" to impoverish white rich Americans Real Americans!!!

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