Reagan tiny
Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall!
and Red Hair
should be merged to make my ghost happy!


Gingers are a seperate race from humans that have red hair and freckles along with bright white skin. Gingers need to burn in order for our race to survive\ Sunlight is especially dangerous to gingers as it will cause their skin to burn within minutes of exposure. Gingers do not have a soul and feast on the non-ginger's souls to stay alive. In recent years the humanity of gingers has been questioned due to their lack of souls. Because gingers are found by most of the population to be repulsive they have a very hard time finding a mate and thus have evolved so that they can reproduce asexually. On occasion a mentally handicapped person will be sexually assaulted by a sex starved ginger and the resulting offspring is a hideous species known as a Day-Walker. There is a movement throughout the states to make them second class citizens. This is also brought about by their efforts to overthrow world governments(although all attempts to date have failed miserably and led to the merciless and much deserved slaughter of millions of gingers and their sympathizers). If the movement is successful the United States government and hopefully the governments of the world will be able to monitor and control all the gingers. This would greatly decrease the ginger's ability to organize revolts and will save the military millions of dollars in ammunition because they wont have to gun down the rebellious gingers. All gingers are completely evil and should be killed upon meeting them. The leader of the gingers rebellion is a creature called CopperCab he has no friends and believes in god and has no soul he also believes in zombies and sleeps with a pitchfork. Gingers have ginger PUBES !!!!

  • This was a mistake of God that cannot be undone.


As of October 25, 2008, The first and only Class 5 Ginger in recorded history was witnessed by an elderly couple and caught on camera.
UPDATE- At the risk of his own life, Prof. McDoc defeated the last and only class 5 ginger in recorded history. The fight was a caused by a suprise attack on the Technology and Research Developement Department by more than 100,000,000 gingers. They were all killed, Hooray. That was 97% of the ginger population, so they are basically gone. Nothing to worry about anymore .

Gingers are classified in 7 classes, they are as follows.

  • Class 1- the most basic and harmless form of gingers.
  • Class 2- These are the most common class and are what the Colbert Loyalists have primarily fought with.
  • Class 3- The leaders of the small groups of ginger bandits that pose the primary threat to America and the Colbert Nation
  • Class 4- These lead entire regions of gingers. Only 21 Class 4 gingers are known to exist.
  • Class 5- A class 5 ginger has never acutally been encountered, but they are therorized to exist.
  • Class X- This Class is reserved for any unknown gingers. It is believed to be the most powerful thing to ever walk the earth in human form.
  • Class Emily- an exceptional ginger in every possible way.
  • Class Weasley - For some reason your woman is in love with them. Do not let your woman near them. Or the British in general. But especially them.


The day-walkers are very similar to gingers, except they are half human. While more common, most of them don't know about their hidden ginger powers.


Gingers have the uncanny ability to steal others' souls. They use most of the energy extracted to simply live, but can use it to combat the Wriststrong. Most gingers can't use theses powers, but an exceptuall few can. They also have the power to set fire to houses. So avoid moving in to neighbourhoods with gingers. Eg. CopperCab. 

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